following an unknown path

a pictorial year in the life of amanda

Continuing a blogging tradition that I started three years ago when I first started blogging . . . a month by month look at my 2008 using only one photo per month.

(BTW, each month name below is a link to a calendar view of pictures taken that month and uploaded to flickr. Just in case you wanna see more than 12.)

January: We Went on Our First Date

February: And Dated Some More

March: We Shared the Gospel Together

April: I Turned 30, but I had Someone to Celebrate With Me

May: We got Engaged

June: I Got to Meet My Nephew for the First Time

July: Smith Girl's Threw Me a Bridal Shower

August: Lawrance Came to Texas and On the VERY Last Day of the Month . . . We Got Married!!

September: We Honeymooned in San Antonio

October: We Enjoy Married Life (ie. I learn to cook Chinese food and Lawrance builds some shelves)

November: The In-Law's Come over for Dinner

December: We Celebrate Our First Christmas as Husband and Wife

So, this was one LIFE CHANGING year . . . awesome in every way imaginable!!  We look forward to seeing what 2009 brings! 

Blessings!

A Little History:

The first year I did this, 2005, I had just started blogging which started because I had discovered 43things, flickr, and library thing.  Flickr and the blog are the only two things that stuck.  And, just like my non-virtual life, my flickr account is in need of a little organization.  Maybe one day . . .

Anywho, back to 2005, it was the year I discovered the freedom a digital camera offers.  I have carried a camera in my purse since 1999.  That's nearly ten years now.  I wanted to be able to record moments of life as an exchange student.  It became a haibt to always carry my camera with me.  In fact, the non-expense of picture taking with a digital camera hit me so strong I took so many pictures that year, I was so overwhelmed I quit printing them out.  Too hard to choose which ones to print. 

In 2006, my brother came to Taiwan and my sister and good friend (as well as three others) got married. And, I took over 9000 photos to record these awesome events.

In 2007, even though my cousins came to Taiwan (which was awesome), I didn't even take half as many photos as I did in 2006--a measly 4,000 something. 

So, in 2008, life changing year, . . . wanna guess how many photos I took?

witnesses

Right after the wedding we got a group shot of everyone who came to witness and celebrate with us our marriage.

Group Shot #1: Everyone look at the camera

Group Shot #2: Everyone give the Taiwanese "yeh" sign

Group Shot #3: Everyone watch the groom get to kiss his bride again :)

oreo cookie kisses

Our photographer took some really fun photos with me and some of my family.  Since they were all in black and me in white . . . I nicknamed these photos "oreo cookie kisses."

Of course with my grandmothers, they would be pink oreos.  Come on NeeNee, you can make it!!

Waiting for Mom Sarah gets a head start.

And I love these next two of me and my dad.  I always loved the photo of mom and grandpa hanging in Grandmother's hallway.  I thought it was a such a sweet photo.  I loved it so much she actually gave it to me a few years ago.  Now I have my own to hang next to hers. 

love is . . .

Following our vows, my sister and brother, our matron of honor and best man, read aloud the famous 1 Corinthians 13 passage on love together.    My sister read part and then my brother the next part, back and forth sharing the reading of the entire passage.

I felt just slightly like I was at a tennis match. :)  But, I loved the way it sounded with a shared reading like that.

Both our vows and their reading of 1 Corinthians were just on plain white computer paper that my dad had hidden in his black officiant's notebook and then handed to us at the right time.  We could have tried to do something a little more sophisticated, but well there isn't time for everything.

I love this shot of Sam taken right after they had finished reading. 

honoring grandparents

In Chinese culture, respecting ancestors and elders is important.  So, Lawrance wanted my grandparents to be an important part of our wedding.  He wanted to find a way to honor them in our wedding.

So, we asked my grandparents to read 1 John 4:7-21.  PawPaw, my paternal grandfather read the first seven verses, and my maternal grandmother read the last seven verses.

My maternal grandparents were married for over sixty years before my grandfather passed away.  And my paternal grandparents have been married for over fifty years.  What a blessing to hear two people I love and admire SO much--who all have and still do play a very important part in my life--read scripture about love at our wedding!

 

who gives this woman?

Since my dad walked me down the aisle and also officiated our wedding, we had Jerry--a neighbor and close friend for a long time--to open the wedding with prayer and then wait with Lawrance at the front. 

He also asked the question, "who gives this woman to this man?"

Before my dad answered, Jerry moved out of the way, and my dad took his place in front.

He then spoke very personal words as he "gave me away."  When he was done, I had to ask for a tissue--I'm so glad that Sarah had one.   . . . and that wasn't the last of the tears either.  A few more would come later.

I LOVE this photo taken while my dad was "giving me away."  The smiles on both his and Lawrance's faces are awesome!!!

getting ready for the "big day"

After the quasi-rehearsal, we all grabbed a quick bite to eat and then started to get ready.

The hardest part of my entire wedding planning was finding someone to do my hair (and make-up).  No one seemed to be available because it was a holiday weekend and others never returned my calls.  At times it was a bit frustrating.  But, in the end, I finally knew why I had to wait until the week of the wedding to secure someone to do my hair (and make-up). 

She--the stylist--was at another salon.  We had to wait for her to change jobs and then for her new employer who had turned me down before to go through a list of brides and see if they had found a hair stylist yet.

Why??  Because this stylist needed to hear about God's kindness.  She needed to be encouraged in her faith.  She freaked out and got goose bumps as I told her our story of God's grace in our lives.  It meant a lot to her.

Did I enjoy the bumpy, emotional roller coaster ride of stylist after stylist rejecting me or accepting and then later declining?  No, not at all.  But, now looking back . . . I see God's hand in it.

This was one of the things were I was glad I was not "married" to any one idea.  Because she totally didn't do what I had picked out from online photos, and she didn't do exactly what she had practiced on the practice day.  But, it turned out to be something I liked, and that looked like "me" (my style) and still captured the feel of what I wanted (simple but elegant). [Oh, yeah, and I also wanted something that hid the fact that 85% of my hair was permed straight.] So, that's great!! 

So, without further ado, I give you the wedding hair:

And, just for comparison, here is the trial run from a few days before the wedding:

Here are some other shots of us getting ready. 
 

Not only was the stylist blessed on that day by our story . . . she made my getting ready simply fun.  She was relaxed, comfortable in her own skin and made me laugh--which as you know I love to do!!

And, of course, what wedding day is complete without the official MOB nap?

Side note: It took me a long time to finally voice why looking "beautiful" was important.  When I had a little meltdown over not yet finding someone to help with hair styling, Lawrance of course was like "What's the big deal.  You are beautiful no matter what. You could come down the aisle with nothing done to your hair and no make-up and you would still be the most beautiful bride in the world to me." He was very kind and encouraging. 

I knew he was right.  I knew beauty is all in the eye of the beholder and only skin deep.  I knew my mom was right--that I'd glow because of the day and day's events. 

But . . . I wanted to "feel" beautiful too.  I wanted to "feel" special.  Since I'd permed my hair straight, I felt like I had no idea how to make it "nice" or wear it more formal.  Curly hair is so much easier!!  And, I wear very little make up on a day to day basis.  I wanted a little something that looked natural and accentuated the positive.

At times I felt very vain for wanting to feel beautiful . . . but . . . this was a special day, so I wanted to feel and look special too. 

quasi-rehearsal on site

After we worshiped together, we piled in cars and headed north to Salado.  Then, we had a lunch time rehearsal with the family members who would be in the wedding.

We didn't do a full, formal rehearsal because (1) the day before we were at my grandmother's 85th birthday party, (2) the night before there was another wedding going on, (3) there were only a few people involved--it didn't seem necessary, and (4) the groom's family didn't come to the wedding.

Let's talk about that real quick. . . . Since the time from deciding to marry and the actual wedding was very short--three months--that made buying international tickets difficult.  Originally it was his father's idea that we go ahead and marry this summer instead of waiting another year, so since it was their idea this softened my guilt of not having them be apart of the day.  But really, this entire ceremony was a very Western/Christian thing to do . . . the ceremony we choose to do has little to no meaning to my new in-laws.  This does NOT mean it is not important to them nor does it take away the sadness that they were unable to attend, but it does lessen the sadness a little. 

Also, we are going to also celebrate our marriage in a very Taiwanese way in the spring (6 months after our American wedding) which will be MUCH more meaningful and important to them.  All involved felt ok with our decisions . . . and Lawrance didn't mind so (I made sure of that MANY times) . . . so this was what happened/is happening: we celebrate American style in America and Taiwanese style in Taiwan.

Lawrance was also comforted by the fact that neither of my grandfathers had their families present at their weddings . . . he felt like he was in great company. :D

(We also had another quasi-rehearsal a week earlier for some of the "little people" who would be in the wedding.  We wanted them to know what to do, but didn't want them to have to stick around for several hours waiting for the wedding to start.)

Here are a few shots from our informal and VERY HOT rehearsal:

morning of wedding

Our wedding was at 6:30 pm in another town about 45 minutes away from my parents' home. 

Since we didn't have a rehearsal the night before, we did a walk though around noon with the family members in the wedding and then met for a lite lunch.  Then the girls left to go get hair and make up done. 

But . . . before I get ahead of myself . . .let's talk about the morning of. 

Lawrance decided to include a tradition from Taiwanese weddings into our wedding day in America.  In Taiwan the bride and groom give a gift of appreciation to their parents.  Since we were not going to do this at the wedding, he decided to invite my parents over to our neighbors' home (where he was staying; they are more than neighbors since we've worshiped together for over ten years). 

Lawrance desired not only to thank my parents for how they raised me and for allowing him to become a part of the family, but he also desired to start off the day focused and centered on Christ.  He wanted to calm his own nerves by worshiping the Lord, reading Scripture, and spending time in prayer.  He wanted to remember the whole purpose of this day was to glorify God.

We met at the neighbors' home at about 9:30 for a great southern breakfast and then a time of worship and prayer.  During this time, Lawrance presented my parents with a gift of appreciation.  And, I also presented the neighbor couple a gift of appreciation. 

Lawrance led this very special time . . . which left all the girls in tears. :)

It was a WONDERFUL way to start off one the most special days in our lives! 

thoughts about our wedding

One of the things I fought during wedding planning was stress.  Meaning I made every effort possible to avoid it.  I totally wanted to enjoy the preparation and the day of as much as possible.  Of course there were a few intense moments--but let's just chock those up to little sleep and an uncooperative-for-the-moment computer. :)

In fact, for this self-confessed perfectionist, letting go of so much that I would have wanted "perfect" was both a struggle and a blessing.  My mom was great in her constant encouragement of "no second guessing" and "no, you are not allowed to rethink that."

Some other things that helped the stress factor was that we planned everything in practically one month.  The first month we were engaged I was still in Taiwan . . . I started to look at things online (mostly images of real weddings on flickr and a few blogs about real weddings).  And we did decide place and date that first month, but that was about all.  Oh, yeah, and I choose the gerber daises--the oh so important gerber daisies which set the mood for everything else I decided! :)

The third month, Lawrance was in America, and I wanted to spend lots of time with him, showing him Texas and introducing him to family.  So, of that third month, only the last week was "wedding week."  We did do a few other "wedding" stuff his first day in the States--got the marriage license, fitted the boys for tuxes, and picked out our rings.  But that was it for the next few weeks.

It was that second month back home that mom and I did most of the planning.  So, I count this as a good thing and not as a stressful thing because I couldn't have it in whatever elusive "perfect way" I could envision.  I loved that my choices--due to time and money--were limited.  Instead of how in the world could I make this as beautiful as possible, I was limited to "here is choice one, two, and three; which one do you like best?"  "Two please, but can we do it in pink instead?"  "Yes."  Ahh . . . so nice.

I also didn't have time "to be married to any idea."  There were several times we "cut" stuff simply because to do it in the time we had it would have been stressful . . . and no one but us even knew it was cut.

I wanted our wedding to be simple, joyful, and God-centered.  I wanted it to be uniquely us, but still have traditional elements.  I wanted it to be worshipful and reverent but at the same time a fun celebration.  I know it's a dichotomous combination, but somehow it totally worked and came together beautifully if I do say so myself! :)

And, Lawrance was totally flexible about so much and OH SO VERY supportive.  For example . . . one night as I was picking out songs to use for the wedding, he sat across from me folding tissue pompoms (which he is now an official expert at making).  I, of course, asked him his opinion, he gave it, and then I totally didn't go with his opinion.  I, of course, asked him though "is that ok that we go with the one I want instead?"  To which he very kindly replied, "I know what my job is.  My job is to fold pompoms, be here for you and support any decision you make.  So, yes, that song is great.  Good choice, honey."  And he meant every word; he wasn't being sarcastic. 

day of events and pictures in up coming posts . . . :)

a shower

A few months ago . . the weekend before Lawrance came to America, there was a "Smith Family Bridal Shower" where all of my aunts and most of my cousins came to shower me with blessings.  It was the first time in two years that I had seen most of them!! 

My mom and sister did all the decorating . . . and they did a great job.  It was so colorful and fun . . . because, well, they used gerber daisies. 

See how cute? And yes they made those really cute daisy cookies!!

We ate at a local Chinese food place that does the round table, everyone share thing.

Mom made me wear a silly veil for awhile while we played some shower games:

And, the girls blessed me with some cute stuff for our master bathroom, things to use in the kitchen, a great cozy blanket for two, and some beautiful lingerie too.

One last photo . . . of me with mom, Sarah, and Grandmother.  I am blessed.  Oh, so blessed!! :)

family reunion

Last week we had our first ever annual Parmley family reunion.  There were a total of four generations present ranging in age from 2 months to 76 years. :)

What a special time together as a family.  Thanks for making it happen, Mom!

Lots more photos of all the fun on flickr.

In other news, yesterday marked three weeks till the wedding . . . it's getting close!! Yipee!!

making decisions

I've made more decisions in the past three weeks than I think I have in the past three years!!

I mean just deciding about the cake alone I think I must have made at least 15-20 decisions!  It's crazy!!  I had no idea wedding planning included this much deciding.

I am SO thankful that we went with the inn.  It was so much easier just answering her questions and choosing from preselected possibilities then thinking and searching and planning and trying to make it all work.  Even having to think of all the questions that needed answering would be an insurmountable task!

And don't even get me started on how hard making all those decisions on music are.  Once I choose what song I want to use, I then have to sort through and find the version I like best.  It can be overwhelming to say the least.  I have set this task aside and will work with Lawrance on it when he is here.

Oh, yeah, all that and I'm planning all the things I want Lawrance to experience while he is here for a month.

And, I made a small registry  . . . that just about killed me.  I honestly was overwhelmed with all the decision making at that time.  Do we really need this?  Do we need that one or this one more?  Is there room for this in our suitcases?  Is it really worth the space and weight it will take up? 

I am SO thankful my brother (who for those of you who don't know is only 14) went with me.  It's summer vacation; he was bored; there was a "gun" to use . . . it was a great excuse to get out of the house.  Actually, he was a blessing.  A few times he got a little impatient with me and was like "yes.  get it;" scan.  But, for the most part he helped me think though and make decisions.  And most of all he was incredibly patient.  I did however have to remove duct tape, a ficus tree, a turquoise tamale steamer, a bobble head thing, and a few other random surprise items off the registry when I got home. :)

Oh, yeah, and another person who has been awesome in all this is my mom.  She has also been really patient and understanding too.  She also keeps chanting "no second guessing" or "nope, can't rethink it now" to me. :)  After I added a fourth color two weeks ago, she stated firmly "no more changes." 

And, when I've vented to Lawrance he's been good about either encouraging me and supporting me or about helping me refocus and keep the Main thing the main thing.  And, of course, he is constantly bathing the all of the wedding planning in prayer.  What a blessing!

Ok, so . . . . all that to say. . . . I am SO tired of making decisions.  I have no idea how some of you who have long engagements spend a year or longer doing this.  I think I would literally crash and burn.

But, praise God!  I think I'm on the downward slope now and have made the majority of the decisions regarding wedding ceremony and reception.  Just need to spend some more time planning how to spend our time together before the wedding experiencing life in America.

engagement noodles :)

Recently, Lawrance and I went back to Meinong with his family to celebrate our engagement. His grandmother was so happy for us, she decided to treat the whole clan to noodles! She reserved the restaurant and called all the relatives to come home for the weekend. It apparently was a BIG deal. :)

It's too bad I was sick. I was right in the middle of a cold at the time. It started on Thursday and was at its worst on Monday. Lawrance took good care of me though by forcing me to go see the doc who said the reason my "common cold" was so bad was because it had activated my asthma. So, once my airways were open again . . . I started feeling much better. So, today, Wednesday--I'm feeling better--and went to school for the first time this week. Now, if only I can survive the next two weeks!!

Anyway, back to this weekend, I am so blessed to be welcomed with open arms into this family. So many people I tell about our engagement are surprised at how welcoming the Wu family has been to "a foreigner" marrying into the family. Even non-believers have been telling me how much God is blessing Lawrance and me. How cool is that?!?!

See all you Texans soon!

With much love,
amanda :)

(Originally posted on June 11, 2008.)

nate nate

I've been able to hold and give sugars to my nephew twice now.  Both times were wonderful!!!

He is such a cutie and such a good baby!  What a blessing!!!

Below are some of the photos I took of Nate with his Uncle Sam (my brother, who strongly dislikes being called Uncle Sam), Nonny (his grandmother, my mom), Great Grandma (Nate is my grandma Smith's eleventh great grandchild!!), and Mommy (my sister) too. :)

here he is!!

Skype is so WONDERFUL!!  I love that I can video chat with my mom--it is great to actually be able to talk to AND see my family!!  In about an hour, my mom is going to be setting up her laptop in the hotel for me to be able to video chat with my sister, and I hope I get to see baby Nate too!!!

My mom sent me these videos and pictures before she left to go to the hospital to see her daughter and grandson again!  They make me SO HAPPY!!

Several of you have asked when I plan on going home to see my nephew in person . . . well, I leave Taiwan on June 23rd.  I fly into Austin, near where my parents live, so sometime soon after that as soon as I can hitch a ride to Dallas I'll get to meet Nate in person!! :)

my nephew has entered the world :)

I'm an aunt!!!!!  Below is the email my mom sent out updating family on her first grandchild's arrival!:

Nathan Lee H------ has arrived! It was a long and difficult labor--about 15 hours, with Sarah pushing for over 1.5 hours and the baby not making enough progress, so she had to have a c-section. (She was being induced 3-4 weeks early because Nate was too big and amniotic fluid too low.) So, after entering the hospital at 5:00 AM, Sarah and Chad had a baby at 10:39 PM on Friday, May 30th!!

Nathan weighed 8 lbs and 5 oz, was 19.5 inches long. His little forehead and one eye were bruised from being stuck, and he has the cutest little conehead!! Since it was a c-section, we didn’t get to hold him…..Chad got to go with Sarah to OR and see Nate arrive. Then Chad and Nate stopped by to say hi, but were quickly taken to the nursery for washing, weighing, etc. I’m anxious to get back to the hospital and hold him!! They had to have the neo-natal unit standing by, since he was 3-4 weeks early….imagine that ---- a nine pound preemie!! But the neo nurses weren’t needed….he was fine!

Sarah and Nate will be in the hospital for 5 days, I think. Nate’s Grandpa H----- had open heart surgery on Wednesday, and is doing as well as can be expected, still in ICU. Chad has been/still is under a lot of stress, caring for both wife/baby and parents.

Love to all,
Joi (Nonny!!)

a day for birth

Right now my sister is giving birth to her first son!  I am sad that I can't be there but I am SO thankful for modern technology that allows me to keep up to date on things as they are happening.

I'm on my way to bed . . . but I am guessing (hoping) that when I wake up, my nephew baby Nate will have entered the world.

Sarah, I am SO excited for you and Chad!!  YAY!!! :)

Picture to left is of Sarah at 35 weeks--taken earlier this week!  Nathan is coming a month early . . . and was already measuring 8lbs 8oz's and 20.6 inches by the sonogram tech.

And, because I asked her too . . . my sister has started blogging!!!  I am so excited to be able to keep up with her and her growing family this way!  Thanks Sarah!!!

Ok . . . I hear my pillow calling my name. 

53

Only 53 days left till I go home for the summer!!! 

I can't wait!!  It's been TWO full years since I've seen my family.  That's just too long in my opinion!!  My brother has gone from little boy to young man.  My sister has gone from newlywed to new mom.  My parents have/are both changed/changing jobs, and they totally redecorated the living areas of their home.

Of course, skype video helps them feel not quite so far away . . . but it is not the same at all!!  And, I am very thankful for things like email and flickr so that I can very easily share my life and be a part of theirs as well.  Oh, so much better than waiting months for handwritten letters to cross the ocean. 

BUT . . . still . . . despite my thankfulness in technology helping us keep in touch easily . . . I am SO READY to see my family.  To hug them and touch them and sit with them and play with them and just enjoy being with them!

And . . . another way that I can tell that I am SO READY to go home is that every time I think about what I wanna eat I can only think of American foods and restaurants.  Nothing Chinese sounds good anymore.  For the past two years I've not had this "problem," but every time I know it's getting close to the time to go home I start having this "problem."  I think it is funny how we "know" things on several levels.  How subconsciously I am allowing myself to start to miss/desire American foods for the first time in two years.  Oh sure, I've had random cravings for specific foods occasionally, but not the same as every single meal time only being able to think about American foods. 

(Speaking of American foods, Mom, do you think you can make chicken and dumplings even though it will be the middle of the summer?  I've not had that in  . . .what? . . . six years now???  Pretty please!!)

name the grandparents update

Thanks to all the suggestions on helping to name my parents last month. 

My mom and dad have decided to try "Nonny and Poppy."  I think they would be ok with baby Nate changing these names, but this is what he will be encouraged to call them.

help name my parents

Ok, so they both already have real names. :)  What we'd like help with is their "grandparent" names. 

My dad suggested awhile back I ask my blog readers for some ideas--kinda like I did with my dog a few years back.  So . . . what do you call your grandparents or what do your grandchildren call you?  Or, have you heard of something cute and creative someone uses?

I'm pretty sure they've decided not to go with classic "grandma" and "grandpa."  They want something a bit more "fun."  Because . . . hey, they are!

So, please comment and help my parents name themselves.