following an unknown path

so kiss me

After my dad blessed our new marriage with payer, he then told Lawrance some words he'd been waiting a LONG time to hear:

Can you tell how excited we are?

Finally, he hears . . . "Lawrance, you may now kiss your wife."

And so . . . we had our first kiss, as husband and wife. 

I have no idea how long it lasted . . . all I know is that he started kissing me before I had a chance to "pucker up." So, the entire time we are "kissing" I'm actually "smiling."

So, when he finally releases me from our first kiss, I can't help but laugh . . . from excitement, joy, and from not actually being able to kiss back and just the blissful awkwardness of it all. :)

We are so grateful for God's grace in enabling us to be able to share our first kiss as man and wife. 

You should see the looks on people's faces--especially nonbelievers--when I tell them our first kiss was on our wedding day.  They can't believe it.  Sometimes, ironically, it seems like if in that instant they lose all respect for me, thinking I must be insane. 

We dated nearly two months before he held my hand because he knew that once we started touching we would just want more and more.  So he waited. 

After we were engaged is when the physical intimacy beyond hand holding started.  The day he asked me to marry him is also the first day we hugged--a very awkward side hug at that.  The first time he kissed me on the cheek was a few weeks later during our engagement photo session (right there in that photo to the left).

Anyway, point is even with caution and even with taking it very slow, after getting engaged the physical intimacy began to heat up rather quickly, especially the month we were in America together.  We are both so glad that we had that line of no mouth to mouth kissing because in so many ways it helped us stay pure--even when we wanted more. 

There were a couple of times the month before the wedding where I was like, "ahh just go ahead and kiss me . . . there is nothing wrong with kissing before our wedding day."  But, he wouldn't.  He had promised me our first kiss would be on our wedding day, and so he kept his promise.

What a blessing!! 

In all it's awkwardness it was totally worth waiting for . . . and a moment I will never, ever forget.

{Oh yeah, and by the way, I think kissing this guy has now become one of my favorite pass-times. ;)}

unity cermonies (part two)

In addition to the sand ceremony, we also choose to do a "cord of three strands ceremony" too.

I have no idea how I found this, but I do know I found it while surfing for ceremony ideas, and that I ended up here, which is a site that explains the idea and sells the cords. This was probably the last thing we added to the ceremony. 

Lawrance loved the idea.  It was also something that we could easily do in both the American and Taiwanese ceremony, and something we could frame and keep for a long time.

I braided the three cords while Lawrance held them, and then he tied the end of the braid together with a small wire when I was done braiding. 

Here is what we put in the program to explain the symbolization of this unity ceremony:

Ecclesiastes 4:12 illustrates the importance of Christian companionship. Two Christians that are bound together in Christ are stronger than the individuals themselves. We believe that Christian marriage is about more than the union of one man and one woman. The Bible teaches us that God performs a miracle in our marriage, uniting us together in a covenant relationship with Him as one. The Cord of Three Strands is a symbol of that sacred union created today.

The gold strand symbolizes that we have invited our Lord Jesus Christ to the position of authority in our marriage relationship.

The purple strand represents the groom. It illustrates the majesty of God as head over the husband. As Lawrance submits himself to the Lord, the Lord in turn will hold the marriage together through him.

The white strand represents the bride. It illustrates the purity of the bride of Christ. As we receive Jesus Christ as our personal Savior and Lord, we are cleansed through Christ.

(Some of this wording came from the site where we got the cords.)

Here is also what my dad said before we started to tie the cords: 

Lawrance and Amanda have also chosen to braid three strands together into a single cord. A "threefold cord" is a symbol of union. Where two are closely joined in love and fellowship, Christ will, by his Spirit, come to them, creating a threefold cord.

In braiding these three strands together, Lawrance and Amanda are demonstrating that their marriage is more than a joining of two lives together. It is a unity with God as well. They are choosing to allow God to be at the center of their marriage, woven into every aspect of it.

As I started braiding the cord, Lawrance told me I was going too fast and needed to slow down.  So, I slowed down a lot just to tease him.  Well, apparently to some of our guests the exaggerated movements I made as I slowed down seemed to them that I was flirting with my groom during the ceremony.  That wasn't the case . . . but we both did laugh at my silliness in taking his slow down command very seriously. :)

While we tied the cords, we had "Savior Like a Shepherd Lead Us" playing.  We used 4Him's Hymns: A Place of Worship CD.  This song was my mom's suggestion--she always thought this was a great hymn to use at a wedding, and we agreed.  We thought about using it for the recessional, but it just wasn't "peppy" enough.  However, I do love the words of the song, and I am glad we found a place for some of it to be heard during our wedding.

Savior, like a shepherd lead us, much we need Thy tender care;
In Thy pleasant pastures feed us, for our use Thy folds prepare.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! Thou hast bought us, Thine we are.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! Thou hast bought us, Thine we are.

We are Thine, Thou dost befriend us, be the guardian of our way;
Keep Thy flock, from sin defend us, seek us when we go astray.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! Hear, O hear us when we pray.
Blessèd Jesus, blessed Jesus! Hear, O hear us when we pray.

Thou hast promised to receive us, poor and sinful though we be;
Thou hast mercy to relieve us, grace to cleanse and power to free.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! We will early turn to Thee.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! We will early turn to Thee.

Early let us seek Thy favor, early let us do Thy will;
Blessèd Lord and only Savior, with Thy love our bosoms fill.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! Thou hast loved us, love us still.
Blessèd Jesus, blessèd Jesus! Thou hast loved us, love us still.

(Words attributed to Dorothy A. Thrupp, 1836)

unity cermonies (part one)

We decided on two unity ceremonies.  We were going to wait and do the unity candle when both mothers could be present to help light the starting candles, so I looked online for some other options.  I will explain the first one today, and plan to explain the second one tomorrow.

So, from searching online (which is how I did 94.9% of my wedding planning) I saw the "sand ceremony."  From what my online surfing tells me is that it started as a trend from California beach weddings.  Candles don't stay lit very well on a beach, so those wanting to have a unity ceremony started combining two containers of sand into one.

We made two unique twists to our sand ceremony--at least I've not read about others doing what we did.  One, we used sand from two different countries.  This is what really sold me on the idea of doing the sand ceremony--that we could combine sand from Taiwan and sand from the US.  And, we also used a solid white base at the bottom of our vase; this was to symbolize Christ being the foundation of our marriage. (We had talked about using rocks--because who wants a marriage built on sand--but Lawrance was afraid the rocks might eventually break the jar.

While we poured the sand, we played recordings from three special people in Taiwan reading Scripture in Mandarin Chinese.  Ellen, one of my dearest friends, read Isaiah 60:19-22; Dennis, one of Lawrance's Christian teachers, read Psalm 67; and Corrina, our matchmaker read Psalm 128.

Also, to make things more simple--it is not easy to move in a big white dress--instead of moving to a table to pour the sand, we just had the table placed behind my dad.  And then when it was time for the sand pouring, my dad turned around, handed us the separate vases, and held the vase we were pouring into. 

I found official "unity sand ceremony" vases online for upwards of 50/60 dollars or more.  We got ours at Hobby Lobby for just a few dollars.

We carried our combined sand jar/vase back to Taiwan with us.  Lawrance had it in his carry-on.  He was stopped at every security check-point because of it.  :)  And, the sands inside are now all mixed up completely. Since we were already expecting this, we weren't too disappointed that it's no longer in pretty layers.

This is how we explained the sand ceremony in our wedding program:

Just as Jesus Christ is the Lord of our lives and the Rock of our Salvation, He will now be the solid foundation that holds our marriage firm. This is symbolized by the white sand in the bottom of the bottle. We both have sands that symbolize our individual lives and selves. As we pour our sands together, it shows how our lives—once separate—are now inseparable. Just like Matthew says, we are no longer two but one flesh, what therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. To make our sand ceremony even more special, Lawrance is pouring sand from Taiwan, while Amanda is pouring sand from America.

another look at the wedding bands

Here is a photo we took after the ceremony showing off our wedding bands.  Lawrance loves this photo, and I guess I do too. :) 

And, I can never decide if I like the photo with the rings on the pink flower or the yellow flower better.

symbols of our love and faithfulness

We have matching wedding bands--the only difference is that his is hammered and, of course, larger.  Also they are both engraved on the inside with our initials, the symbol for eternity, and our wedding date.

For this part of the ceremony we repeated after my dad and used English only. 

I loved this part of the wedding.  I'm not sure why, but it was a "magical moment" for me.

Just look at the way this guy looks at me . . .

 . . . his expressions melt me.

love is . . .

Following our vows, my sister and brother, our matron of honor and best man, read aloud the famous 1 Corinthians 13 passage on love together.    My sister read part and then my brother the next part, back and forth sharing the reading of the entire passage.

I felt just slightly like I was at a tennis match. :)  But, I loved the way it sounded with a shared reading like that.

Both our vows and their reading of 1 Corinthians were just on plain white computer paper that my dad had hidden in his black officiant's notebook and then handed to us at the right time.  We could have tried to do something a little more sophisticated, but well there isn't time for everything.

I love this shot of Sam taken right after they had finished reading. 

i almost forgot the amens

I almost forgot to mention that the whole time I was reading my vows to Lawrance he was talking back to me.

He kept saying things like, "Amen," "Praise the Lord," and "Thank you, Jesus." 

I'm sure my dad heard, but I'm not sure anyone else did.  It was so sweet.

Kind of distracting . . . but very precious.

our wedding vows

When we were wedding planning, I'm not sure how but I stumbled onto Adrian & Andrée Warnock's wedding vows.  I printed them out and showed them to Lawrance.  We both loved how much Scripture was in the vows.  But, we also loved the vows that my dad had written . . . so we used both. 

Also, one of the engagement ceremonies I went to here in Taiwan had the future bride, future groom, and the future in-laws answer several questions in a row.  I really liked that.  To be asked lots of questions and then only answer with one simple "I do" . . . too easy.

Also, I remembered my dad telling me after one of the many weddings he has officiated that brides and grooms are so excited and/or nervous (ie. just plain full of emotion), they don't really know grasp all that they are actually agreeing to.

Refusing to be in that group, we paid careful attention to our vows.  We probably discussed our vows more than anything during the beginning planning stages of our wedding.  And, we also separated the questions, so each of us said "yes" several times.

Speaking of the "yes."  I told my dad when he was planning the ceremony that we wanted there to be a focus on grace, the sovereignty of God, and of the idea of a covenant.  So, my dad changed the simple "I do" to " I do so covenant with the Lord and Amanda/Lawrance" (depending on the speaker).   We loved that change!

So, here are the questions posed to me:

Dad: Do you Amanda Nicole Parmley, in the presence of Lord and all who are present here, promise and covenant yourself to walking with the Lord as the ultimate priority of your life, will you commit yourself to a life of spiritual maturity in the Lord, a life of the pursuit of physical purity, and emotional purity?
Me: I do so covenant with the Lord and Lawrance.

Dad: Do you receive Lawrance as your God given husband, to accept him as a precious gift from God, to commit all that you are to the Lord and to Lawrance, to submit to him just as the church does to the Lord Jesus?
Me: I do so covenant with the Lord and Lawrance.

Dad: Do you commit yourself to Lawrance to receive him and accept him just as he is. To remain sexually faithful to him, and to him alone. To abandon the pursuit of all others?
Me: I do so covenant with the Lord and Lawrance.

Dad: Do you promise yourself to Lawrance, spiritually, physically, and emotionally, to cherish and to keep him, to meet his needs in sickness and in health until the Lord separates you through death or his return?
Me: I do so covenant with the Lord and Lawrance.

After we answered these questions, we then made a profession of our covenant to each other in both English and Chinese.  This is the part we borrowed from the Warnocks, and Lawrance translated them into Mandarin for us.

What's interesting is that we both thought before the wedding that hearing the other speak our heart language was important.  But, actually, hearing the other one speak their vows in their heart language was more important to each of us. 

I held it together while Lawrance made a commitment to me in English, but I totally lost it (ie. started crying) when he started to say the exact same words in Chinese. The same was true for Lawrance.  Hearing me make my profession in English was more meaningful to him that hearing me speak it in Chinese.   Although I cried through all the way through speaking in both languages.

So, I am very glad we both decided to do it in both languages even if it did take a lot of time.  Our vows weren't short.  ;)

Here is my profession of our covenant--I LOVE the last part.   I'm not sure if it is the last version we ended up using or not, also I can't seem to find my copy of Lawrance's profession at the moment.  Lawrance made the Chinese phrases less "formal" in my part so that they were using words and phrases I was more used to.  If there is a bunch of goobly-gop after the English below, your computer doesn't like Chinese. :)

I, Amanda Nicole Parmley take you, Lawrance Aaron Wu to be my lawfully wedded husband. I promise, by God's grace, as He enables me to submit to you and to obey you in everything, as I do to the Lord. I recognize you as my head, even as Christ is the head of the church. In so doing I resolve to put my trust in God and not give way to fear. I will cultivate the beauty that comes from a gentle and quiet spirit knowing that this is of great value to God.

I will speak the truth to you in Love. I will encourage you and strengthen you in your walk with God. I will not let the sun go down on my anger; instead I will be gracious to you, tender hearted, forgiving you even as God has forgiven me. I will trust in the Lord with all my heart and not depend on my own understanding; I will acknowledge Him in everything, knowing that He will direct our paths. I will follow Him wherever he leads us, putting the extension of his kingdom before all worldly possessions and pleasures. I will be peaceful, content and joyful in every situation we encounter knowing that He is at work for our good and that we can do all things through his strength.

I acknowledge before the Lord my continuous need for his grace in my inability to do all these things, and rely on him alone for the power I need to live in a Godly way as your wife.

我，李樂恩，選擇你吳裕仁為我的丈夫。 我倚靠神的恩典使我能凡事順從你， 如同我順服基督一樣。 我認定你為我的頭，如同基督是教會的頭。因為我完全相信上帝，所以我不會怕。 我將培養上帝看為寶貝的智慧　那就是溫柔跟平靜。

我會用愛心對你說誠實的話。 我會鼓勵跟幫助你跟神同行。 我將不會對你生氣到晚上， 反而給你我的安慰、溫柔的心而且原諒你如同上帝原諒了我一樣。我將我的信心完全給上帝　不是我以前的經驗。
在我們所行的事上， 我相信上帝會完全帶領我們。無論祂帶領我們到什麼地方， 我都會緊緊跟隨祂。 擴張神國度的事　 比屬世的財富跟享樂重要。 我有平安、滿足與喜樂來面對所有的光景， 因為我完全明白上帝祂在掌權 而且透過他的能力，我們凡事都能做。

我在上帝面前承認，我會單單倚靠神來當你的妻子 過一個合神心意的生活。因為離開了上帝的恩典，上面說得一切我完全沒辦法做到。

honoring grandparents

In Chinese culture, respecting ancestors and elders is important.  So, Lawrance wanted my grandparents to be an important part of our wedding.  He wanted to find a way to honor them in our wedding.

So, we asked my grandparents to read 1 John 4:7-21.  PawPaw, my paternal grandfather read the first seven verses, and my maternal grandmother read the last seven verses.

My maternal grandparents were married for over sixty years before my grandfather passed away.  And my paternal grandparents have been married for over fifty years.  What a blessing to hear two people I love and admire SO much--who all have and still do play a very important part in my life--read scripture about love at our wedding!

 

who gives this woman?

Since my dad walked me down the aisle and also officiated our wedding, we had Jerry--a neighbor and close friend for a long time--to open the wedding with prayer and then wait with Lawrance at the front. 

He also asked the question, "who gives this woman to this man?"

Before my dad answered, Jerry moved out of the way, and my dad took his place in front.

He then spoke very personal words as he "gave me away."  When he was done, I had to ask for a tissue--I'm so glad that Sarah had one.   . . . and that wasn't the last of the tears either.  A few more would come later.

I LOVE this photo taken while my dad was "giving me away."  The smiles on both his and Lawrance's faces are awesome!!!

a walk to remember

When I started thinking about a song to walk into with (I didn't want to come in with traditional wedding music.), I immediately thought of and really liked "For the Beauty of the Earth."  Lawrance liked the melody but didn't think it had enough "power" or "majesty" for a bridal entrance.  When I told him that was the exact reason I wanted it, he thought it was a great choice.

So, are you ready?  Here we go . . .

Uh, yeah . . . it was not exactly like that. :)  This great photo--that Lawrance and I both love (and want to duplicate with the two of us when we get married in Taiwan)--was taken after the ceremony. 

I was a bit emotional walking down the aisle with my daddy. 

And, uh, yeah, "a bit" is a huge understatement! :)

Over a million thoughts flooded though my head we walked together.  My dad was so kind.  He was talking me though walking down the steps out of the chapel, being very gentle and supportive.  I then told him, "Daddy, I'm not gonna make it.  I'm gonna cry." 

His response was "You are?" 
"Yes," I cried back.
"That's ok," was his calm response.

Then I did all I could to stop the tears--hence all the funny faces.  They were happy tears, but still I didn't want to totally be crying all the way down the aisle. 

Here is a photo of my dad talking me though walking down the steps.

I finally was able to manage a smile . . . and I finally rounded the small curve and was able to see my groom. Yay!!

For the joy of human love, . . .
Lord of all, to thee we raise this our hymn of grateful praise.  (lyrics from "For the Beauty of the Earth")

the processional

Like I've mentioned before, we got married outside under a big tree.  It was a gorgeous tree that is over 100 years old.  All the pompom flowers you see hanging from the tree were made by Lawrance (well, I did a few to show him how, but then he did all the rest)--didn't he do a great job?

While Sam and Lawrance seated the grandparents and my mom, Fairest Lord Jesus was playing.

And, here is a moment I am SO glad was caught on film!!  I love my mom!!!

Then Jerry--our dear friend and neighbor for many years, who also welcomed his home up to Lawrance while he was in Texas--opened the ceremony with prayer. 

Then the boys--Lawrance and Sam--came in.  My brother served as Lawrance's best man.  He did such a great job.  I loved looking over at him several times during the ceremony, sweat pouring off his face, but always getting a smile from him.
 

Then our junior bridesmaids and my sister, serving as the matron of honor walked in.  The bridesmaids walked while "Love Divine, All Loves Excelling" was playing.

These precious girls are from my home church.  I used to take them to "little ladies lunch" after church when I was at home working on my master's degree.  They would sit with me during the service, and are some of the beautiful young woman I am blessed to call my "little friends."  God has graciously blessed me with "little friends" everywhere I go!  Now, they are young woman . . . it was a treasure to have them be a part of our wedding. 

Also my junior bridesmaids were a HUGE help!  They carried my train while we took photos.  They ran to get me some lip gloss in the middle of the reception.  Anything I needed they were happy and willing to help with.  One of my friends said that she wish she had had junior bridesmaids at her wedding because of just how wonderful a help they were to me. 

next time . . . here comes the bride . . .

a private moment together before the wedding

We wanted to see each other before the wedding . . . so we did. :)

After getting ready, we had a few moments alone.  Then our photographer (my oldest, as in longest known, friend) came in and took some shots of us enjoying those first few moments as bride and groom--our last few moments before becoming husband and wife.

I LOVE this photo; she caught his expression beautifully!!!

I also decided--a few days before the wedding--I didn't want the veil to cover my face.  I needed to read my vows and do some other things during the ceremony, and to me it was just in the way.  So, I was just going to wear the veil in my hair.  But, then when all was said and done, (like after it was in my hair and I was putting on the dress), it bugged the heck out of me.  Too puffy and now it no longer served a purpose, so it seemed pointless to me.  Wearing a veil didn't make me more or less a bride.  So, I wanted to remove it all together.

I knew this part of the wedding was important to Lawrance--the lifting of the veil.  So we talked about, and he suggested we do the veil lifting privately on our own before the ceremony.  So, we got a few veil shots before the ceremony.  And, I am SO glad that we did . . . some of them turned out really cute!!

There is one more thing I have to tell you about the veil-lifting.  In Taiwan, men roll the bride's veil up and over, so it is a slow ceremonious event.  So, that is what he did.

But . . . after he was done rolling . . . still not kissing on the lips.  We've waited this long we could wait another half hour. ;)

Here we have it step by step.  It was so fun!!  I'm glad we did this . . . and I liked very much that it was just between the two of us.

We're ready . . . come on guests hurry up!  We wanna get married!!! :D

Seeing each other before the wedding was a great decision.  It wasn't part of Lawrance's culture to wait to see the bride.  In Taiwan, the groom goes and gets his bride and brings her to the celebration--lots of cars, noise, and fireworks in procession (in modern times at least).  And, we'd already seen each other all that morning and early afternoon . . . so why not? 

It was a very special moment and perhaps my favorite of the day--ok, one of the top highlights of the day.  It also made my walk down the aisle much less nerve-wrecking.  We were able to fully enjoy the ceremony and the meaning of it all rather than be so caught up in seeing each other for the first time after getting ready--which is so absolutely wonderful in and of itself.

I would highly recommend it to others!!!  It is a decision I am VERY happy with!

On the other hand . . . sometimes looking back at some photos I regret that I made the decision to not wear the veil so quickly; I love photos of brides wearing veils.  I love the photos we have of me wearing a veil.  So, I console myself by thinking I can make sure to wear a veil at the Taiwanese celebration.  So, it's all good.  If I didn't have that bit of consolation, I'd choose to be pleased that I did at that moment what seemed best.  HOWEVER, I still reserve the right to decide at the last minute I don't wanna wear it again. ;)

putting on "the dress" and other bridal details

Finding a modest wedding dress is NOT easy!!  There are many more choices online than there are in the stores. . . but after just a few hours of trying on dresses, I realized how VERY important it is to actually try on the dress.  Especially when the wedding day is less than 60 days away. :D

So, what I ended up with is perhaps not one I would have picked had I had more time to be selective (picky), but I learned to love it and am happy with this choice.  And, I was also very grateful that it fit without alterations; the only alterations needed were to add the bustle to the train.  Oh, yes, and we added cap sleeves that I taped with body tape to my shoulders to keep in place and give just a little more coverage.

Lawrance was totally unfamiliar with the "can't see the dress before the wedding" tradition in America . . . and not very happy about it either. He kept begging to see the dress.  The dress hung in a bag on my bedroom door for a week before the wedding . . . he was very tempted to unzip the bag and take a peak. 

But somethings are worth waiting for. Later, he told me that he thought the wedding dress is like wrapping paper on a present.

The Dress:

Mom and Sarah helping me get dressed:

Mom reassuring me (I love the look on her face here):

Everyone helping out:

I also took a few bridal shots before the wedding since I hadn't done that earlier:

Some of the bridal details . . .
The pearl earrings I wore were the same ones one my mother wore on her wedding day.  My paternal grandmother had given them to her upon my parents' engagement. 

The necklace, was my "something borrowed," it also belongs to my mom.  My dad gave it to her this past Christmas.  I liked that it was simple and elegant. Just a single drop pearl on a 

The strand of tiny pearls around my wrist was my "something old."  My mom had a broken pearl necklace that had belonged to her paternal grandmother (my great grandmother).  Lawrance and I restranded the smallest of the pearls into a bracelet. I was so afraid it might break (they holes were very tiny so we had to use really skinny string) and that 60 precious little pearls would spill everywhere.  But, it didn't.

And, my shoes . . . cuz I wanted to go barefoot but that didn't please the groom . . . I compromised and wore sandals that I found at walmart for next to nothing . . . and that Lawrance absolutely loved. :)  So, all was good there.

And the lace on the dress . . . that was probably my favorite part of the whole dress . . . the train was lace!!

Yay!!  all ready . . . now let's get this party started!!   Bring on the groom . . .

getting ready for the "big day"

After the quasi-rehearsal, we all grabbed a quick bite to eat and then started to get ready.

The hardest part of my entire wedding planning was finding someone to do my hair (and make-up).  No one seemed to be available because it was a holiday weekend and others never returned my calls.  At times it was a bit frustrating.  But, in the end, I finally knew why I had to wait until the week of the wedding to secure someone to do my hair (and make-up). 

She--the stylist--was at another salon.  We had to wait for her to change jobs and then for her new employer who had turned me down before to go through a list of brides and see if they had found a hair stylist yet.

Why??  Because this stylist needed to hear about God's kindness.  She needed to be encouraged in her faith.  She freaked out and got goose bumps as I told her our story of God's grace in our lives.  It meant a lot to her.

Did I enjoy the bumpy, emotional roller coaster ride of stylist after stylist rejecting me or accepting and then later declining?  No, not at all.  But, now looking back . . . I see God's hand in it.

This was one of the things were I was glad I was not "married" to any one idea.  Because she totally didn't do what I had picked out from online photos, and she didn't do exactly what she had practiced on the practice day.  But, it turned out to be something I liked, and that looked like "me" (my style) and still captured the feel of what I wanted (simple but elegant). [Oh, yeah, and I also wanted something that hid the fact that 85% of my hair was permed straight.] So, that's great!! 

So, without further ado, I give you the wedding hair:

And, just for comparison, here is the trial run from a few days before the wedding:

Here are some other shots of us getting ready. 
 

Not only was the stylist blessed on that day by our story . . . she made my getting ready simply fun.  She was relaxed, comfortable in her own skin and made me laugh--which as you know I love to do!!

And, of course, what wedding day is complete without the official MOB nap?

Side note: It took me a long time to finally voice why looking "beautiful" was important.  When I had a little meltdown over not yet finding someone to help with hair styling, Lawrance of course was like "What's the big deal.  You are beautiful no matter what. You could come down the aisle with nothing done to your hair and no make-up and you would still be the most beautiful bride in the world to me." He was very kind and encouraging. 

I knew he was right.  I knew beauty is all in the eye of the beholder and only skin deep.  I knew my mom was right--that I'd glow because of the day and day's events. 

But . . . I wanted to "feel" beautiful too.  I wanted to "feel" special.  Since I'd permed my hair straight, I felt like I had no idea how to make it "nice" or wear it more formal.  Curly hair is so much easier!!  And, I wear very little make up on a day to day basis.  I wanted a little something that looked natural and accentuated the positive.

At times I felt very vain for wanting to feel beautiful . . . but . . . this was a special day, so I wanted to feel and look special too. 

quasi-rehearsal on site

After we worshiped together, we piled in cars and headed north to Salado.  Then, we had a lunch time rehearsal with the family members who would be in the wedding.

We didn't do a full, formal rehearsal because (1) the day before we were at my grandmother's 85th birthday party, (2) the night before there was another wedding going on, (3) there were only a few people involved--it didn't seem necessary, and (4) the groom's family didn't come to the wedding.

Let's talk about that real quick. . . . Since the time from deciding to marry and the actual wedding was very short--three months--that made buying international tickets difficult.  Originally it was his father's idea that we go ahead and marry this summer instead of waiting another year, so since it was their idea this softened my guilt of not having them be apart of the day.  But really, this entire ceremony was a very Western/Christian thing to do . . . the ceremony we choose to do has little to no meaning to my new in-laws.  This does NOT mean it is not important to them nor does it take away the sadness that they were unable to attend, but it does lessen the sadness a little. 

Also, we are going to also celebrate our marriage in a very Taiwanese way in the spring (6 months after our American wedding) which will be MUCH more meaningful and important to them.  All involved felt ok with our decisions . . . and Lawrance didn't mind so (I made sure of that MANY times) . . . so this was what happened/is happening: we celebrate American style in America and Taiwanese style in Taiwan.

Lawrance was also comforted by the fact that neither of my grandfathers had their families present at their weddings . . . he felt like he was in great company. :D

(We also had another quasi-rehearsal a week earlier for some of the "little people" who would be in the wedding.  We wanted them to know what to do, but didn't want them to have to stick around for several hours waiting for the wedding to start.)

Here are a few shots from our informal and VERY HOT rehearsal:

morning of wedding

Our wedding was at 6:30 pm in another town about 45 minutes away from my parents' home. 

Since we didn't have a rehearsal the night before, we did a walk though around noon with the family members in the wedding and then met for a lite lunch.  Then the girls left to go get hair and make up done. 

But . . . before I get ahead of myself . . .let's talk about the morning of. 

Lawrance decided to include a tradition from Taiwanese weddings into our wedding day in America.  In Taiwan the bride and groom give a gift of appreciation to their parents.  Since we were not going to do this at the wedding, he decided to invite my parents over to our neighbors' home (where he was staying; they are more than neighbors since we've worshiped together for over ten years). 

Lawrance desired not only to thank my parents for how they raised me and for allowing him to become a part of the family, but he also desired to start off the day focused and centered on Christ.  He wanted to calm his own nerves by worshiping the Lord, reading Scripture, and spending time in prayer.  He wanted to remember the whole purpose of this day was to glorify God.

We met at the neighbors' home at about 9:30 for a great southern breakfast and then a time of worship and prayer.  During this time, Lawrance presented my parents with a gift of appreciation.  And, I also presented the neighbor couple a gift of appreciation. 

Lawrance led this very special time . . . which left all the girls in tears. :)

It was a WONDERFUL way to start off one the most special days in our lives! 

thoughts about our wedding

One of the things I fought during wedding planning was stress.  Meaning I made every effort possible to avoid it.  I totally wanted to enjoy the preparation and the day of as much as possible.  Of course there were a few intense moments--but let's just chock those up to little sleep and an uncooperative-for-the-moment computer. :)

In fact, for this self-confessed perfectionist, letting go of so much that I would have wanted "perfect" was both a struggle and a blessing.  My mom was great in her constant encouragement of "no second guessing" and "no, you are not allowed to rethink that."

Some other things that helped the stress factor was that we planned everything in practically one month.  The first month we were engaged I was still in Taiwan . . . I started to look at things online (mostly images of real weddings on flickr and a few blogs about real weddings).  And we did decide place and date that first month, but that was about all.  Oh, yeah, and I choose the gerber daises--the oh so important gerber daisies which set the mood for everything else I decided! :)

The third month, Lawrance was in America, and I wanted to spend lots of time with him, showing him Texas and introducing him to family.  So, of that third month, only the last week was "wedding week."  We did do a few other "wedding" stuff his first day in the States--got the marriage license, fitted the boys for tuxes, and picked out our rings.  But that was it for the next few weeks.

It was that second month back home that mom and I did most of the planning.  So, I count this as a good thing and not as a stressful thing because I couldn't have it in whatever elusive "perfect way" I could envision.  I loved that my choices--due to time and money--were limited.  Instead of how in the world could I make this as beautiful as possible, I was limited to "here is choice one, two, and three; which one do you like best?"  "Two please, but can we do it in pink instead?"  "Yes."  Ahh . . . so nice.

I also didn't have time "to be married to any idea."  There were several times we "cut" stuff simply because to do it in the time we had it would have been stressful . . . and no one but us even knew it was cut.

I wanted our wedding to be simple, joyful, and God-centered.  I wanted it to be uniquely us, but still have traditional elements.  I wanted it to be worshipful and reverent but at the same time a fun celebration.  I know it's a dichotomous combination, but somehow it totally worked and came together beautifully if I do say so myself! :)

And, Lawrance was totally flexible about so much and OH SO VERY supportive.  For example . . . one night as I was picking out songs to use for the wedding, he sat across from me folding tissue pompoms (which he is now an official expert at making).  I, of course, asked him his opinion, he gave it, and then I totally didn't go with his opinion.  I, of course, asked him though "is that ok that we go with the one I want instead?"  To which he very kindly replied, "I know what my job is.  My job is to fold pompoms, be here for you and support any decision you make.  So, yes, that song is great.  Good choice, honey."  And he meant every word; he wasn't being sarcastic. 

day of events and pictures in up coming posts . . . :)

first month as husband and wife

Yesterday marked our first month together as a married couple!

Lawrance went to a job interview while I was at work; we both left about the same time.  I beat him home because well my school is closer and, well, my lovely hubby stopped to pick me up some colorful gerber daises! 

What a great guy that new hubby of mine is!  They were totally unexpected! 

If there were only one thing true about my husband it is that he is VERY SWEET!! :) 

Happy one month, honey!  I look forward to each minute I get to spend with you as your wife.

here we go . . .

I can't thank my mother enough for helping us to have our wedding at an inn that is handling nearly everything for us!!  Our stress has been minimal in regards to wedding planning even though we only had three months to plan our wedding.  And, one of those months we were still in Taiwan and one of those months we were busy spending time with each other, sightseeing, and meeting with family.

Also, our pre-marital counselor (a missionary in Taiwan) gave us a golden piece of advice.  He told Lawrance to give me one specific set time each week to talk about wedding stuff with him, the rest of the time we were to work on continuing to build our relationship and prepare for marriage.  We weren't supposed to discuss wedding stuff 24/7.  It was golden advice.  It was great for me, and, I think, it was good for him too. 

So, I thought I'd share with you just exactly what our current mental states are: 

You'd be amazed (well then again, if you know us IRL, maybe you wouldn't) at how many people have told us how loud our house is going to be--a place of fun and laughter and just sheer joy!!  Of course, we hope we also have done the same thing with the wedding.  We hope it is a fun, fun, time of joy and laughter . . . and an opportunity to glorify God because He is our everything, the reason for all the fun and laughter we share.

Our wedding is in two days . . . here we go!!

"Yes, the Lord has done amazing things for us!
What joy!"
(Psalm 126:3 NLT)

horseback riding

An important thing to do while in Texas: ride a horse. 

Some of our friends that we worship with (their two little girls are some of my "little friends" and will be junior bridesmaids in our wedding) own and board horses.  So, we made a deal--let us babysit your kids so yall can go on a date and in return let us ride your horses. 

It was wonderful.  We loved the horse riding and the babysitting too. :)  Lawrance had difficulty getting on the hose, and I had trouble getting off.  Needless to say there was lots of laughter going on all night.

p.s. bug on tongue is plastic.  :)