following an unknown path

guojong and meishiang's wedding

This past weekend, Lawrance and I had the privilege to attend our first Taiwanese couple wedding as a married couple. (We attended a wedding in Taiwan earlier this year . . . but both the bride and groom were American.) 

It was a sheer joy to watch these two friends--both believers--commit to living life together forever.

The elder who helped them with their vows so totally STRESSED that this was a forever thing. He even made them take 10 seconds to reconsider their desire to marry and gave them a chance to back out guilt free if they wanted to.

Because the churches here are small and because the wedding party is usually just one best man and one bridesmaid (in white too), usually the groom comes down the center aisle before the bride.  So . . . here comes the groom . . .

and the bride too . . .

Lawrance was able to get the cute flower girl to smile for the camera.

They repeated their vows together at the same time both facing forward. I'm glad they got to say vows at all though . . . because many times Taiwanese weddings have no spoken vows.


He rolled her veil (a Taiwanese tradition) SO SLOWLY . . . it was obvious he was cherishing each moment.
SO SWEET!!!


The elder who led them in their vows, also had the privilege of stamping their (unofficial) marriage certificate.

They honored their parents by giving them bouquets of flowers near the end of the ceremony.

Then both sets of parents stood up, faced the wedding guests, and bowed in order to show their appreciation for the guests' attendance.

What followed next were several group photos with the bride and groom front and center. :)

And, finally, after much coaxing (from me and my hubby), we finally were allowed to get a photo of just the bride and groom.

And, then, after some major begging, we were able to get a photo of the newlyweds kissing--well . . . at least of him kissing her on the cheek.

Before we all headed off for the banquet, Lawrance and I were able to get a photo alone with our friends on their wedding day.

sticky idols

Idols are literally EVERYWHERE in Taiwan.

When I was at our local walmart/target-like store, I found these: 3M sticky idols. 

I was truly taken aback at first, but then I remembered that this is Taiwan, the island of a thousand gods.

Father, please continue to have mercy on the Taiwanese people giving them more time to respond to your grace.  Soften their hearts and open their eyes.  Set them free from the idol worship that binds them.

ten years ago, I wrote my first "blog"

Ok, so actually it was written on what is called a website . . . but still I was trying to make it like a blog before blogging platforms were abundantly everywhere. 

Ten years ago, in a school's computer room somewhere in northern Taiwan, I became a blogger, and I didn't even know it!

To get my printed photos online, I began using using a scanner in Chinese and yahoo's geocities to record my daily life here in Taiwan.  The photo quality is terrible . . . and the layout was tedious, but, if I do say so myself, the design was better than many "homemade" websites from the late '90s. 

But OH!  if I had had flickr and blogger back then, not to mention a digital camera  . . . how sweet that would have been!!!! 

In fact, I carried my mom's 35mm film camera in my purse daily for a year.  Soon after that I got my first digital camera, and so for nearly 10 years now my purse has always housed a point and shoot camera.  It is essential--more important than lipgloss and a driver's licence!

Anyway, Geocities is closing later this year, which made me want to take a walk down memory lane.  Feel free to click through and see what life was like for me as an exchange student in Taiwan in 1999. 

Here was my very first "blog." (nothing is there now besides the "first blog," which I didn't even know was a blog at the time.)

I had an index/home page (which originally was set up kinda of like flickr's sets page), that I changed when I started using another site and then changed again when I moved to blogging.

Here are the "1st pages of each group of photos":

flying cows in taiwan
summer in taiwan
studying in taiwan
residing in taiwan
friends in taiwan
sightseeing in taiwan
holidays in taiwan
classmates in taiwan
religion in taiwan
vacation in japan

Based on these "album" names, can you guess what I called that very first site? 

That's right "amanda in taiwan."  And, yes, my love for not using capital letters in my online world titles started with this very site . . . ten years ago!! (Can you tell I'm having a hard time accepting it was a decade ago that all this happened!?!?!)

Bye-bye, my dear first online home.  Rest in peace.

a surprise gift

There is a eighty year old man at our church who is a master calligrapher.  He has gifted several of members of our church with calligraphy. 

We were his latest recipients.  He gave us this print that is 1 Corinthians 13.   

He told us that he gave us this artwork because (1) he sits behind us in church and enjoys seeing us arm and arm and (2) I have good English (I wonder why?? *smile*).

We've been told that this print is worth as much or more than our new fridge!!  And it (the calligraphy, not the fridge) was just given to us folded in a brown envelope!  WOW!!! :)

Lawrance and I got it framed last week, and then Law hung it up in our living room this week.  Law enjoys doing calligraphy himself; and, he absolutely loves our new living room art work.

We are SO blessed!

lawrance cooks on fridays

We both work mostly in the afternoon and evening--somewhere between 3-9ish.  So, we usually have our mornings together, so our "big meal" is lunch time.  Monday to Thursday I do the cooking, but since I have class on Friday mornings, Lawrance has been cooking on Fridays recently.

When we married he could fry an egg and boil instant noodles. 

Law's mother is an excellent cook, and she prepares three meals a day every day.  They hardly ever ate out.  Moreover, she grows her own vegetables organically.  Very healthy, very frugal.  (Confession: this knowledge kinda scared me after I found out . .. I knew I'd never be able to live up to that.)

Anywho, one day he got the random idea to call her and ask how to make shrimp and fried eggs.  Then he started playing around with other dishes. 

Let's just say . . . I'm blessed. :)  I always look forward to lunch on Fridays.

ancient chinese wedding photos (well, kinda)

The headdresses and clothing is all handmade and real (and real old too).  Also, the headdress I wore was incredibly heavy--I would guess several pounds.

We didn't do the entire "2 day professional photo taking extravaganza" that most nearly-weds here in Taiwan do.  We just did a quick afternoon session to get some photos of us in traditional wedding attire and a few studio shots in our own wedding attire too.

(Note the red scarfs--long one for him, small one for me.  I've yet to know why they were used.)

Like most things we do together, it was fun. :)

our taiwanese wedding banquet

So, right after the ceremony, we headed over to a large Chinese restaurant for the wedding banquet. 

Law's parents picked out the restaurant, but we were pleasantly surprised that they had chosen a restaurant that was own by a Christan.  Very cool!!

Here are some of the banquet highlights:

• Before the whole thing started we (the bridal party) were ushered into a little room for a small rest.  This was very nice.

• We were then introduced and entered the banquet hall.
  

• There were 27 tables at our wedding, which means 270 people.   (Ten people per table is the traditional standard. You tell others how many were at your wedding by telling them how many tables there were.)

• 270 people at a wedding banquet is not considered a large wedding.  Small to medium at best.  I've been to one with 100 tables--that's 1000 people!!

• Also, just FYI, only about 80 people attended both the church ceremony and the wedding banquet.  Many just showed up for the banquet, some were only able to attend the ceremony only, and students were invited to ceremony only.  So, less than a third of the people at the banquet had been at the ceremony.

• After the formal introduction, we sat at the head table at the front with parents, and uncles (and their wives).
  

• After the first dish or so was served, we went "on stage" with his parents and my best friend's father, Lin BaBa, who stood in as my "Taiwan father." (I love how the two dads seems as if they are standing at attention.)
  

• We toasted everyone (using cranberry juice, interesting to me since in the States we probably would have used grape juice).
  

• Law and I then did the "couple entwined armed" toast together. :)
  

• After a few more dishes, we sang a Karaoke song together.  The only love song I know in Chinese is "The Moon Represents My Heart," so that is what we sang! :)
  

• Then he had to "wei wa" wine.  "wei" means to feed someone something--kinda like a mother bird feeds her baby chicks (and "wa" means "me").  SO . . . he first had to put the wine into his mouth and then "pour" it into mine. All I could think about was "don't you dare get any on my dress!" :)
  


• Soon after that the two of us toasted the main family table--parents and uncles.
  

• Next, his parents, Lin Baba (my adopted Taiwanese dad), and Big Uncle joined us as we toasted each table.  Waitresses guided us through the entire room, and followed us making sure we all had full glasses.
  

• There were several other Karaoke songs sung.
  

• Law's parents decided on all the dishes that were served.  There was a lot of seafood.  I ate little, and appreciate the photos people took of the meal since I didn't get to see it all.
  

• When Law's brother and his girlfriend wanted to sing a song, Law "punked" them by making them kiss for a long time.  They "punked" him back by making us show him how . . . so we kissed for 9 seconds--the whole room helped keep count. "9" in Chinese is pronounced "joe" which is the same pronuncation of "long."
  

• After a bit more eating and Karaoke, we stood at the door kinda like a receiving line, passing out candy and photos to our guests.
  

• Some of our good friends stayed a bit longer, and so we took a few more photos together.
  

• Then finally we left . . . .
  

• YAY!!  Weddings OVER!!!! :)

a wonderful wedding gift

We got some amazingly creative wedding gifts that I will share details of with you a bit later.  Today, I just wanna celebrate our biggest gift of all. . . . a new fridge!! :)

Many friends and family (on both sides of the ocean) graciously gave us cash as a wedding gift.  It is the traditional wedding gift in Taiwan, but not so in America.  However, we are very thankful for all our American friends and family understanding that many traditional wedding gifts from a registry in America would have been quite impractical. (Nevertheless we did register for a few items for our home, and I know my mom and sister would love to see what they look like in place, so I'll do that a bit later too.)

Boy, I am gabby today!! :)  Guess I must be excited. ;)

So . . . now . . . . for the grand revealing . . . .our beautiful new fridge that arrived yesterday: 

Although it fits perfectly in the "fridge spot," from this photo it seems to dwarf our entire kitchen! :) 

The fridge part is on top (which I LOVE).  I love being able to stare directly into the fridge part.  Before we had a freezer top fridge, so I had to lean over and down to look into it.

Then below the two door fridge, there are two sections that pull out.  The middle section is for fresh fruit and veggies (a huge crisper, I guess).  And the bottom is the freezer.

So, instead of shelves, it is kinda like a top loading deep freeze--just pile and stack.  I really like it.

Here are some shots I took last night of the inside of our new fridge--this might be the only time I ever show you the inside . . . so make sure you take advantage of this once in a lifetime opportunity. ;)  (Clicking the photos will take you to their flickr page.)

 

                   

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And, here are a few photos taken before new fridge's arrival:
   

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And, here is how the little black fridge became black . . .

This fridge was nearly 20 years old.  It was given to me when I first moved to Taiwan.  Some missionaries on the island were leaving to go back to the States and were giving it away. 

Some other missionaries that knew I was coming took it and kept it for a few months, then when I arrived they gave it to me. 

I love the way the missionaries I've met here take care of one another and bless each other by sharing not only material stuff but of their time and care too.  God is good.

We loved little black, but he was not working quite as hard as he once was. Sometimes he would forget to work at all, and at other times he would work so hard EVERYthing--even the eggs in the fridge door--would be frozen! 

He did quit working all together back in 2006, but then he came back on.  I know it sounds weird or insanely selfish to some that God would care about insignificant me and my stupid old fridge, but I honestly believe that God caused it to work again.  He cared for the widow and her son by causing her oil to run over; he cared for me by allowing a broken machine to keep running for three more years.  He is a God who cares about us and meets our physical needs.  What a great God we serve!!

after the ceremony

Traditionally family photos are taken after weddings in Taiwan.  Traditionally the bride and groom sit down front and center, and the most important people in the family then sit beside them.  With others filling in behind. 

They usually look something like this:

or like this:

At the church weddings I've been to here in Taiwan.  After the family photos there is then time for photos with different groups of classmates and friends.  Bride and groom stay put, guests fill in the spaces and photos are taken.

For a plethora of reasons (namely we are fun-loving Lawrance and Amanda, our photograph liked to have fun, and we were a bit rushed for time) our group photo shots are a bit more . . . um  . . .  well . . .  "lively" than your typical Taiwanese wedding. :) 

See for yourself in another slideshow from Abu's photos below:

photos from our ceremony

Here is another slideshow of Abu's photos; this time from the ceremony.

Here are some of the highlights:

• Before the ceremony started, Lawrance lowered my veil.
• Seating of the family included his maternal grandmother, "big uncle" and aunt, and his mom
• His dad walked me down the aisle.
• We had two missionary friends officiate--Mike (from America) and Jonathan (from Malaysia)
• I choose to walk 7 circles around Lawrance at the beginning of the ceremony (a Jewish tradition symbolizing that, as his wife, my life revolves around his)
• Then, he rolled the veil (again, I wanted to see during the 2 hour ceremony, but I knew the veil was important to him)
• During the charge to the couple, Mike shared the Gospel clearly and succinctly using a wedding as an analogy.  It was GREAT!!
• We tied the Cord of Three Stands again
• We also washed each others feet (symbolizing servant leadership and mutual submission)
• We used the same vows, but this time we each only used our own heart language
• Lawrance sang a solo to me right after our vows (it was great!!)
• There were five different songs in the middle of the ceremony (so we sat down)
• I cried again during the vows . . . but this time for different reasons. :) 

I fell deeper in love with my husband as a direct result of celebrating our marriage in front of new witnesses.   However, I did tell him that although I love him deeply, I will not marry him again. ;)

After we talked, trying to compare our two weddings, Lawrance and I concluded that it must be kind of like having two children and trying to choose which one you love the most . . . it is impossible.

 

precermony at church

We didn't want to "hide" before the ceremony.  We were already ready; we were already married; we wanted people to know we were glad they were there, so . . . . there was no reason to hide.

The hardest part of standing out and greeting people was helping my groom let go of his wedding planning role and just relax and be in the moment.

And . . . . to answer yesterdays question . . .
Great guesses with an Asian focus!! :)  But, all wrong . . . I was told that in Taiwan rain on a wedding day indicates that when the groom was a child he used the bathroom outdoors.  I thought that was funny since I thought most little boys have done so. :)

And now for a few photos that Abu took before the ceremony started.  Mostly they are just us with friends and family.

groom gets the bride

Most Taiwanese grooms go to the bride's home to "get her."  Usually the bride's sisters and friends make it difficult on him by playing tricks on him. 

Since the three bridesmaids and I needed to start getting ready at 5 AM, we decided that it would be best for all the girls to say here and for Lawrance and his brother to come and "get us" just like tradition.  However, unlike tradition, my friends were nice to Lawrance. :)

It was raining, so we decided to use my paper umbrella, which is an icon of his mother's hometown (which is also the first city I lived in when I first moved to Taiwan six years ago).  It was the first time my paper umbrella had seen rain. :)

Although unpleasant, the rain provided for some neat photos. 

In American folklore, rain on a wedding day means good luck.  Do you know what it means in Taiwanese folklore?  Guess in the comments and I'll tell you what I was told is the answer in my next post.

Enjoy another flickr slideshow of Abu's photos.

getting ready for the taiwanese wedding

There are so many great photos, I don't know which ones to share first . . . so I'm just going to share them all.  Here is a flickr slideshow of our photographer friend's, Abu's, photos.

The three girls in purple are my bridesmaids: Ellen, best friend and previous college roommate, have known her since 1997.  Kady, former coworker and office mate, very special friend since I moved here in 2003.  And, Cindy, my future sister-in-law, she is my husband's brother's girlfriend (maybe they will wed next year!!). :)

The woman dressed in purple but not in a "bridesmaids dress" is also a very special friend of mine.  Her name is Corrina.  I've known her since 1999, when she became my long-lost big sister.  She is also the one who introduced me to Lawrance . . . I probably owe her my firstborn child she's done so much for me.

Corrina got her sister-in-law to come do our hair and make-up.  She did an awesome job and also loaned us all the hair stuff and the veil too.  She also was the one who brought the bouquets, bouts, and corsages for us.  All I did was provide photos of what I was wanting with the directions of "please use purple and no roses" . . . what she brought was better than any of the photos I sent.

God is kind. :)

 

our taiwanese wedding . . . a quick synopsis

Our Taiwanese Wedding ceremony and banquet was on Saturday! Today is Monday . . . I am still tired beyond all get out.

Our rehearsal ran late, and the bridesmaids all stayed in my home for the night . . . so we didn't get to bed till 1 or 2. Then we were back up at 5 for make up and getting dressed.

Groom and groomsman arrived to pick us up at 8:20 (Taiwanese tradition), and it was RAINING!! :)

Before the ceremony started we stood at the door and greeted our guests for about 30 minutes or so. We had lots of people call or text to say they weren't coming because of the rain. However, still so many of our friends and loved ones braved the rain to come celebrate with us.  We were and are SO grateful!!

The church ceremony was 2 hours long (I've been told that's about average for a Taiwanese church wedding).  In addition to the vows, and charge, and unity ceremonies, it included seven songs that were song and two that were played by instruments (trumpet and flute), in addition to the bridal procession and recession.  So, we had a mini-concert in the middle of our wedding.  I was worried about it being too much and too long, but having our close friends and church family bless us with song was GREAT and made me cry. 

Oh yeah . . . .and one of those songs was a solo from my hubby to me!!!  It was SUCH a BEAUTIFUL SONG . . . and he sang it SO beautifully (if I do say so myself).   Every time he practiced it, I cried, but at the actual wedding I made it through his song without crying.

After the ceremony, we took pictures with different guests for about 45 minutes (mostly students that wouldn't be attending the banquet). Then we took off to the banquet--got there at 12:15 and most all of the guests were already there. All the banquet activity started at about 12:30ish.

Then for the next three hours there was loud karaoke and a huge feast. We sang a song together in Mandarin (the only love song I know in Chinese). We toasted each table one by one.  That's 27 tables and about 27,000 thank yous.  

One traditional thing that I did not do was change dresses three (or more) times. They do this to "show off the beauty of the bride." They rent the dresses from a wedding photo store, but since I had purchased my dress from America, I didn't need to rent a wedding dress. So we choose to keep things a bit more simple, and I just wore my own wedding dress the entire banquet, which also means I actually got to eat and enjoy all the karaoke. :)

After all the feasting and toasting and singing, we stood by the door and said goodbye to our guests passing out candy from special baskets--one was the basket his mom used at her wedding and the other one was made by his grandfather many years ago.

We must have literally taken over a thousand photos. But, so far we only have a few that our friends have posted online. I'll share more as we have them.

 

                       

That's it for now . . . .

All in all it was a GREAT day. . . . a long, exhausting day . . . but VERY wonderful too. :) 

(I "stole" some of these photos from Sandy, who blogs here.  Sorry and thanks, Sandy!!)

please meet our apo

This is Lawrance's maternal grandmother.  In Hakka, grandmothers are called "Apo."

Isn't she beautiful?!? :)

sunday lunch

I had one of my favorite things for lunch on Sunday . . . pineapple shrimp.  YUMMY!! (Please note the use of mayo and sprinkles.)

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Lawrance took me to a fabulous restaurant decorated in a very "Chinese" style. It was great!!

taiwanese toy store finds

Awhile back Lawrance and I had fun looking around in a toy store.  We've actually done this a couple of times since--I guess we are just kids at heart.

Here are some of the cute things we found on the shelves. I love that one"kitchen set" includes the hot water heater thing most homes here have and that the other one is a rice cooker with chopsticks and sushi.

I can't wait to have someone to buy these cute kitchen toys to play with.

Then of course what little kid wouldn't want to zip around on his or her own little moped?

language classrooms can be noisy

Here's proof from one of my classes last year:

The first video is of students debating for one minute on simple topics like "tea is better than coffee" and "watching news on tv is better than reading a newspaper."  I tell them "outside yes, inside no" and then they have to support the opinion I've given them.  Since they only have one minute to discuss the topic, they get really loud really fast.  I love it. 

The second video is of an activity I'm going to do in class tomorrow.  Each student has a partner--one sits down with a pen and paper, the other runs back and forth from one side to the other.  Why?  Well, they look at song lyrics, memorize a line or two, and then run to dictate that line to their partner.  First pair to finish wins. 

Of course not all of the activities we do are this noisy . . . but I do love it when my classroom is so loud I can't think. 

red bombs

Tuesday night we folded, stuffed, and addressed all the Taiwanese wedding invitations.  We are still missing a few addresses . . . but this is one major "to do" that we got done. :)  YAY!!!

Our invitations to the Taiwanese ceremony and banquet are traditional Taiwanese in style . . . and yes, they are red with gold lettering.  Lawrance's parents picked them out.

The inside wording follows the traditional form and announces that an oldest son will be marrying an oldest daughter.  And, we chose to go with Chinese only for these invites.

Oh, yeah, and, like most Taiwanese wedding invitations, they are scented too. 

In Taiwan, wedding invitations are known as "red bombs" because receiving one means you must now "pay money" (wedding gifts are not given, but red envelopes with cash inside are given ).  I think it is kinda sad that, like children, wedding celebrations are considered a burden and not a blessing.  Don't get me wrong, Taiwanese people love weddings . . . but to have the first gut reaction to be "oh no, a red bomb" . . . well, that's just sad.

Anywho, I guess this week are bombing close friends and family in Taiwan.

a sea of flowers

"Where flowers bloom, so does hope."
Lady Bird Johnson, Public Roads: Where Flowers Bloom


Part of our Chinese New Year break we went back to Meinong.  There we found a lovely sea of flowers that delighted me to no end.

not suitable together

(No, no, not me and Lawrance  . . . we are perfectly suitable together! :))

That is what the manager at McDonald's told me when I asked for mayo on my cheeseburger the other day.  In fact, my request was so not ok, the clerk had to go get the manager.  She wouldn't do it because beef and mayo are not suitable together. 

She said she would be happy to put some mayo in a cup and allow me to put it on my own burger but she couldn't couldn't add it to my cheeseburger for me because they "don't go together."

What!?!?!?!

It's been a looooong time since something has shocked me culturally . . . but this sure did.  I mean totally . . . mouth hanging wide open in total culture shock.  I felt like I must be an alien for wanting mayo with my beef.

But, "why?" I asked her.  Her only answer was "well, people in Taiwan don't think mayo goes with beef." 

In my head I'm thinking, "WHAT!!!!! You guys put mayo on EVERYTHING . . . even fried shrimp!!"

Up until this point our whole conversation was in Chinese.  Seeing I was still suffering from acute culture shock the manager switches to English to ensure me that I heard correctly, "they are not suitable together."

Ok, fine, whatever.  I'll take it on the side and put it on myself.

I'm still not satisfied and I've continued to try to think about why . . . is it something to do with ying and yang?  something with the fact that cheeseburgers don't have lettuce and mayo in Chinese is only called "salad dressing" (doesn't work--what about the shrimp)?  something she made up to get me to leave her alone? 

Anyone out there with a another "suitable" possible reason?

She was nice in that she did give me the mayo--enough for 15 hamburgers, no joke--on the side in a sundae cup.  She must have felt really bad for literally sending me into acute culture shock.

(FYI: pic on left is from a few years ago when Sam was here . . . he ordered his dessert in Chinese by himself.  I was so proud of him.)