following an unknown path

oreo cookie kisses

Our photographer took some really fun photos with me and some of my family.  Since they were all in black and me in white . . . I nicknamed these photos "oreo cookie kisses."

Of course with my grandmothers, they would be pink oreos.  Come on NeeNee, you can make it!!

Waiting for Mom Sarah gets a head start.

And I love these next two of me and my dad.  I always loved the photo of mom and grandpa hanging in Grandmother's hallway.  I thought it was a such a sweet photo.  I loved it so much she actually gave it to me a few years ago.  Now I have my own to hang next to hers. 

putting on "the dress" and other bridal details

Finding a modest wedding dress is NOT easy!!  There are many more choices online than there are in the stores. . . but after just a few hours of trying on dresses, I realized how VERY important it is to actually try on the dress.  Especially when the wedding day is less than 60 days away. :D

So, what I ended up with is perhaps not one I would have picked had I had more time to be selective (picky), but I learned to love it and am happy with this choice.  And, I was also very grateful that it fit without alterations; the only alterations needed were to add the bustle to the train.  Oh, yes, and we added cap sleeves that I taped with body tape to my shoulders to keep in place and give just a little more coverage.

Lawrance was totally unfamiliar with the "can't see the dress before the wedding" tradition in America . . . and not very happy about it either. He kept begging to see the dress.  The dress hung in a bag on my bedroom door for a week before the wedding . . . he was very tempted to unzip the bag and take a peak. 

But somethings are worth waiting for. Later, he told me that he thought the wedding dress is like wrapping paper on a present.

The Dress:

Mom and Sarah helping me get dressed:

Mom reassuring me (I love the look on her face here):

Everyone helping out:

I also took a few bridal shots before the wedding since I hadn't done that earlier:

Some of the bridal details . . .
The pearl earrings I wore were the same ones one my mother wore on her wedding day.  My paternal grandmother had given them to her upon my parents' engagement. 

The necklace, was my "something borrowed," it also belongs to my mom.  My dad gave it to her this past Christmas.  I liked that it was simple and elegant. Just a single drop pearl on a 

The strand of tiny pearls around my wrist was my "something old."  My mom had a broken pearl necklace that had belonged to her paternal grandmother (my great grandmother).  Lawrance and I restranded the smallest of the pearls into a bracelet. I was so afraid it might break (they holes were very tiny so we had to use really skinny string) and that 60 precious little pearls would spill everywhere.  But, it didn't.

And, my shoes . . . cuz I wanted to go barefoot but that didn't please the groom . . . I compromised and wore sandals that I found at walmart for next to nothing . . . and that Lawrance absolutely loved. :)  So, all was good there.

And the lace on the dress . . . that was probably my favorite part of the whole dress . . . the train was lace!!

Yay!!  all ready . . . now let's get this party started!!   Bring on the groom . . .

getting ready for the "big day"

After the quasi-rehearsal, we all grabbed a quick bite to eat and then started to get ready.

The hardest part of my entire wedding planning was finding someone to do my hair (and make-up).  No one seemed to be available because it was a holiday weekend and others never returned my calls.  At times it was a bit frustrating.  But, in the end, I finally knew why I had to wait until the week of the wedding to secure someone to do my hair (and make-up). 

She--the stylist--was at another salon.  We had to wait for her to change jobs and then for her new employer who had turned me down before to go through a list of brides and see if they had found a hair stylist yet.

Why??  Because this stylist needed to hear about God's kindness.  She needed to be encouraged in her faith.  She freaked out and got goose bumps as I told her our story of God's grace in our lives.  It meant a lot to her.

Did I enjoy the bumpy, emotional roller coaster ride of stylist after stylist rejecting me or accepting and then later declining?  No, not at all.  But, now looking back . . . I see God's hand in it.

This was one of the things were I was glad I was not "married" to any one idea.  Because she totally didn't do what I had picked out from online photos, and she didn't do exactly what she had practiced on the practice day.  But, it turned out to be something I liked, and that looked like "me" (my style) and still captured the feel of what I wanted (simple but elegant). [Oh, yeah, and I also wanted something that hid the fact that 85% of my hair was permed straight.] So, that's great!! 

So, without further ado, I give you the wedding hair:

And, just for comparison, here is the trial run from a few days before the wedding:

Here are some other shots of us getting ready. 
 

Not only was the stylist blessed on that day by our story . . . she made my getting ready simply fun.  She was relaxed, comfortable in her own skin and made me laugh--which as you know I love to do!!

And, of course, what wedding day is complete without the official MOB nap?

Side note: It took me a long time to finally voice why looking "beautiful" was important.  When I had a little meltdown over not yet finding someone to help with hair styling, Lawrance of course was like "What's the big deal.  You are beautiful no matter what. You could come down the aisle with nothing done to your hair and no make-up and you would still be the most beautiful bride in the world to me." He was very kind and encouraging. 

I knew he was right.  I knew beauty is all in the eye of the beholder and only skin deep.  I knew my mom was right--that I'd glow because of the day and day's events. 

But . . . I wanted to "feel" beautiful too.  I wanted to "feel" special.  Since I'd permed my hair straight, I felt like I had no idea how to make it "nice" or wear it more formal.  Curly hair is so much easier!!  And, I wear very little make up on a day to day basis.  I wanted a little something that looked natural and accentuated the positive.

At times I felt very vain for wanting to feel beautiful . . . but . . . this was a special day, so I wanted to feel and look special too. 

thoughts about our wedding

One of the things I fought during wedding planning was stress.  Meaning I made every effort possible to avoid it.  I totally wanted to enjoy the preparation and the day of as much as possible.  Of course there were a few intense moments--but let's just chock those up to little sleep and an uncooperative-for-the-moment computer. :)

In fact, for this self-confessed perfectionist, letting go of so much that I would have wanted "perfect" was both a struggle and a blessing.  My mom was great in her constant encouragement of "no second guessing" and "no, you are not allowed to rethink that."

Some other things that helped the stress factor was that we planned everything in practically one month.  The first month we were engaged I was still in Taiwan . . . I started to look at things online (mostly images of real weddings on flickr and a few blogs about real weddings).  And we did decide place and date that first month, but that was about all.  Oh, yeah, and I choose the gerber daises--the oh so important gerber daisies which set the mood for everything else I decided! :)

The third month, Lawrance was in America, and I wanted to spend lots of time with him, showing him Texas and introducing him to family.  So, of that third month, only the last week was "wedding week."  We did do a few other "wedding" stuff his first day in the States--got the marriage license, fitted the boys for tuxes, and picked out our rings.  But that was it for the next few weeks.

It was that second month back home that mom and I did most of the planning.  So, I count this as a good thing and not as a stressful thing because I couldn't have it in whatever elusive "perfect way" I could envision.  I loved that my choices--due to time and money--were limited.  Instead of how in the world could I make this as beautiful as possible, I was limited to "here is choice one, two, and three; which one do you like best?"  "Two please, but can we do it in pink instead?"  "Yes."  Ahh . . . so nice.

I also didn't have time "to be married to any idea."  There were several times we "cut" stuff simply because to do it in the time we had it would have been stressful . . . and no one but us even knew it was cut.

I wanted our wedding to be simple, joyful, and God-centered.  I wanted it to be uniquely us, but still have traditional elements.  I wanted it to be worshipful and reverent but at the same time a fun celebration.  I know it's a dichotomous combination, but somehow it totally worked and came together beautifully if I do say so myself! :)

And, Lawrance was totally flexible about so much and OH SO VERY supportive.  For example . . . one night as I was picking out songs to use for the wedding, he sat across from me folding tissue pompoms (which he is now an official expert at making).  I, of course, asked him his opinion, he gave it, and then I totally didn't go with his opinion.  I, of course, asked him though "is that ok that we go with the one I want instead?"  To which he very kindly replied, "I know what my job is.  My job is to fold pompoms, be here for you and support any decision you make.  So, yes, that song is great.  Good choice, honey."  And he meant every word; he wasn't being sarcastic. 

day of events and pictures in up coming posts . . . :)

a shower

A few months ago . . the weekend before Lawrance came to America, there was a "Smith Family Bridal Shower" where all of my aunts and most of my cousins came to shower me with blessings.  It was the first time in two years that I had seen most of them!! 

My mom and sister did all the decorating . . . and they did a great job.  It was so colorful and fun . . . because, well, they used gerber daisies. 

See how cute? And yes they made those really cute daisy cookies!!

We ate at a local Chinese food place that does the round table, everyone share thing.

Mom made me wear a silly veil for awhile while we played some shower games:

And, the girls blessed me with some cute stuff for our master bathroom, things to use in the kitchen, a great cozy blanket for two, and some beautiful lingerie too.

One last photo . . . of me with mom, Sarah, and Grandmother.  I am blessed.  Oh, so blessed!! :)

pompoms and favor bags

Mom and I spent some time this week working on wedding stuff.

First, we started making things to hang at the wedding.

We will be hanging these tissue paper pompoms both in the tree and in the reception hall.  Have I mentioned we are having an outdoor wedding and are getting married under this great big, 200 year old tree:

I've always dreamed of an outdoor wedding.  As a side note, I always told my family that I'd get married barefoot in someone's backyard--it almost happened till mom found the inn.  And, well, I'm going to wear sandals because Lawrance thinks it's safer.

Back to the pompoms.  Mine will be orange, teal, pink, and yellow.  We also have some pomanders made out of several different colors of gerberas to hang from the tree.  Mom made those.

We also bagged candy that Lawrance and I picked out in Taiwan.  Traditionally in Taiwan, a bride and groom will stand at "the exit door" to thank all the guests for coming to their wedding.  This also ensures that everyone at the wedding has one more chance to congratulate the new couple. 

They stand at the door with their parents and pass out candy and cigarettes.  I'm not sure what the cigarettes symbolize; however, I do know about the candy.  :)  The giving of candy at the wedding symbolizes the guests sharing in the sweetness of the new marriage.  Or that the guests wish a sweet life on the new couple. 

Lawrance also told me that in Taiwanese the word for "candy" sounds like "di di" which means "little brother."  So, by taking the candy the guests are also wishing the couple has a son very soon.

One aspect of the candy is that I've been told to take the candy in even multiples.  In other words, never take just one piece.  Taking two pieces is important because you want the two of them to stay married forever. 

So, . . . Lawrance and I got some of the traditional wedding candy and also some other fun Taiwanese candy we thought Americans would like.  We aren't going to stand at the exit door at our American wedding, but we will give out the candy in little bags with an explanation of its cultural significance as our American wedding favors.  The little bags look so cute and make me very happy.

making decisions

I've made more decisions in the past three weeks than I think I have in the past three years!!

I mean just deciding about the cake alone I think I must have made at least 15-20 decisions!  It's crazy!!  I had no idea wedding planning included this much deciding.

I am SO thankful that we went with the inn.  It was so much easier just answering her questions and choosing from preselected possibilities then thinking and searching and planning and trying to make it all work.  Even having to think of all the questions that needed answering would be an insurmountable task!

And don't even get me started on how hard making all those decisions on music are.  Once I choose what song I want to use, I then have to sort through and find the version I like best.  It can be overwhelming to say the least.  I have set this task aside and will work with Lawrance on it when he is here.

Oh, yeah, all that and I'm planning all the things I want Lawrance to experience while he is here for a month.

And, I made a small registry  . . . that just about killed me.  I honestly was overwhelmed with all the decision making at that time.  Do we really need this?  Do we need that one or this one more?  Is there room for this in our suitcases?  Is it really worth the space and weight it will take up? 

I am SO thankful my brother (who for those of you who don't know is only 14) went with me.  It's summer vacation; he was bored; there was a "gun" to use . . . it was a great excuse to get out of the house.  Actually, he was a blessing.  A few times he got a little impatient with me and was like "yes.  get it;" scan.  But, for the most part he helped me think though and make decisions.  And most of all he was incredibly patient.  I did however have to remove duct tape, a ficus tree, a turquoise tamale steamer, a bobble head thing, and a few other random surprise items off the registry when I got home. :)

Oh, yeah, and another person who has been awesome in all this is my mom.  She has also been really patient and understanding too.  She also keeps chanting "no second guessing" or "nope, can't rethink it now" to me. :)  After I added a fourth color two weeks ago, she stated firmly "no more changes." 

And, when I've vented to Lawrance he's been good about either encouraging me and supporting me or about helping me refocus and keep the Main thing the main thing.  And, of course, he is constantly bathing the all of the wedding planning in prayer.  What a blessing!

Ok, so . . . . all that to say. . . . I am SO tired of making decisions.  I have no idea how some of you who have long engagements spend a year or longer doing this.  I think I would literally crash and burn.

But, praise God!  I think I'm on the downward slope now and have made the majority of the decisions regarding wedding ceremony and reception.  Just need to spend some more time planning how to spend our time together before the wedding experiencing life in America.

name the grandparents update

Thanks to all the suggestions on helping to name my parents last month. 

My mom and dad have decided to try "Nonny and Poppy."  I think they would be ok with baby Nate changing these names, but this is what he will be encouraged to call them.

help name my parents

Ok, so they both already have real names. :)  What we'd like help with is their "grandparent" names. 

My dad suggested awhile back I ask my blog readers for some ideas--kinda like I did with my dog a few years back.  So . . . what do you call your grandparents or what do your grandchildren call you?  Or, have you heard of something cute and creative someone uses?

I'm pretty sure they've decided not to go with classic "grandma" and "grandpa."  They want something a bit more "fun."  Because . . . hey, they are!

So, please comment and help my parents name themselves.

i now "officially" look like my mom!!

I saw this over at An Open Book, and thought I'd see if a computer algorithm agrees with most casual observers that I look like my mom.  It did. :)

(P.S. My dad's name is not "dan" . . . I mistyped "dad.")

Christmas Past, 1981 (part 2, a repost)

Today my guestblogger, my mom, finishes the story she started yesterday.  (Just FYI, the pics are from 1979 and 1980--it's the best I could do with what I have here with me in Taiwan.)

It was a warm Texas December night and a very special one for us (ok – very special to me, the sentimental one!).

It was our first time decorating a tree with a child old enough to participate.  We purchased a small Christmas tree from the local grocery store and carted it home on top of our Pinto station wagon. Ken crafted a tree stand out of scrap wood and we placed the tree on top of our end table, hopefully out of the reach of our toddler’s (Sarah’s) grasp.  We placed the lights on the tree and Amanda and I began hanging ornaments.  She was so excited we were celebrating!  I was so excited – I got to keep the traditions!

It came time to turn off the overhead lights and plug in the Christmas tree lights.  As soon as the lights on the tree began shining, Amanda, overcome at the beauty of what she was seeing, spontaneously began to exclaim “Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the Highest! Glory to God in the Highest!  Glory to God in the Highest!”  She raised her arms and began dancing around that small glowing tree praising God, repeating that phrase over and over just as the angels must have done on the first Christmas night.

I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed worship as genuine as the worship I saw that night!  Worship from one with such a pure heart and pure motives – a precious three-year-old, who knew only that we were celebrating the birth of Jesus and that our Christmas tree was shining just as the heavens were the night of His birth when angels praised God and proclaimed His glory. And, she wanted to celebrate and praise Him in the same way!

That Christmas, God gave us just what we needed through the faith and actions of a three-year-old child.  That experience changed our perspective on Christmas celebrations.  We both realized that a Christmas tradition held its meaning only in the heart of the person participating in the tradition – you could focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings felt by reliving the tradition or you could focus on the original intent of the tradition or you could focus on the One for Whom you were celebrating as you participated in the tradition.

In our family, we choose to focus not on feelings or original intent, but on the Reason we were celebrating.

Each year, as we decorate our tree, it is a family tradition to tell the story of the night we worshipped with Amanda around our first family decorated Christmas tree. We seek to have the same worshipful heart as a three-year-old who, though only looking at the lights on a small Christmas tree, saw a sky filled with a host of heavenly angels proclaiming God’s glory at the birth of His Son and joyfully joined in the angels’ praises.

Now that is giving meaning to a Christmas tradition!

~Joi

Amanda: Isn't that a great story!! I just LOVE it!!  My mom is so right . . . when we look at our Christmas traditions--or any traditions for that matter--we can foucs on one of three things: (1) warm, fuzzy feelings, (2) original intent, or (3) Christ. 

For me and my sister (I think she would agree with me), that now as adults, because our parents focused on Christ at Christmas, the "warm, fuzzy feelings" of the holiday didn't dissappear but were intensified.  It is not that our traditions became stoic--how can worship of the long-awaited Savior be emotionless?  No, the "fuzzy feelings" didn't dissappear, they just were not the reason we did the things we did. 

As adults, my sister and I anticipate Christmas traditions because we are excited to worship the King of kings and Lord of lords; we look forward to being able to express our love for him in unique once-a-year Christmas ways.  Through participating in Christmas traditions, we enjoy being able to proclaim "Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the highest!!" and "Jesus, we love you!!" 

This is a repost from last year.  Originally posted here.

It was a warm Texas December night and a very special one for us (ok – very special to me, the sentimental one!).

It was our first time decorating a tree with a child old enough to participate.  We purchased a small Christmas tree from the local grocery store and carted it home on top of our Pinto station wagon. Ken crafted a tree stand out of scrap wood and we placed the tree on top of our end table, hopefully out of the reach of our toddler’s (Sarah’s) grasp.  We placed the lights on the tree and Amanda and I began hanging ornaments.  She was so excited we were celebrating!  I was so excited – I got to keep the traditions!

It came time to turn off the overhead lights and plug in the Christmas tree lights.  As soon as the lights on the tree began shining, Amanda, overcome at the beauty of what she was seeing, spontaneously began to exclaim “Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the Highest! Glory to God in the Highest!  Glory to God in the Highest!”  She raised her arms and began dancing around that small glowing tree praising God, repeating that phrase over and over just as the angels must have done on the first Christmas night.

I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed worship as genuine as the worship I saw that night!  Worship from one with such a pure heart and pure motives – a precious three-year-old, who knew only that we were celebrating the birth of Jesus and that our Christmas tree was shining just as the heavens were the night of His birth when angels praised God and proclaimed His glory. And, she wanted to celebrate and praise Him in the same way!

That Christmas, God gave us just what we needed through the faith and actions of a three-year-old child.  That experience changed our perspective on Christmas celebrations.  We both realized that a Christmas tradition held its meaning only in the heart of the person participating in the tradition – you could focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings felt by reliving the tradition or you could focus on the original intent of the tradition or you could focus on the One for Whom you were celebrating as you participated in the tradition.

In our family, we choose to focus not on feelings or original intent, but on the Reason we were celebrating.

Each year, as we decorate our tree, it is a family tradition to tell the story of the night we worshipped with Amanda around our first family decorated Christmas tree. We seek to have the same worshipful heart as a three-year-old who, though only looking at the lights on a small Christmas tree, saw a sky filled with a host of heavenly angels proclaiming God’s glory at the birth of His Son and joyfully joined in the angels’ praises.

Now that is giving meaning to a Christmas tradition!

~Joi

Amanda: Isn't that a great story!! I just LOVE it!!  My mom is so right . . . when we look at our Christmas traditions--or any traditions for that matter--we can foucs on one of three things: (1) warm, fuzzy feelings, (2) original intent, or (3) Christ. 

For me and my sister (I think she would agree with me), that now as adults, because our parents focused on Christ at Christmas, the "warm, fuzzy feelings" of the holiday didn't dissappear but were intensified.  It is not that our traditions became stoic--how can worship of the long-awaited Savior be emotionless?  No, the "fuzzy feelings" didn't dissappear, they just were not the reason we did the things we did. 

As adults, my sister and I anticipate Christmas traditions because we are excited to worship the King of kings and Lord of lords; we look forward to being able to express our love for him in unique once-a-year Christmas ways.  Through participating in Christmas traditions, we enjoy being able to proclaim "Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the highest!!" and "Jesus, we love you!!" 

This is a repost from last year.  Originally posted here.

Christmas Past (1981) (a repost)

I, Amanda, asked my mom to share one of my family's favorite Christmas stories.  So, today and tomorrow she is guest blogging here at following an unknown path.  Now, without further adieu, let my mom take you back 25 years, to the Christmas of 1981 . . .

Christmastime is supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, but there was conflict in our household.  My husband and I disagreed for most of our newly married four years on how we should celebrate Christmas and neither of us wanted to give up any ground.  However our children were getting older (3 years and 18 months), and we needed to reach an agreement on how our young family would celebrate this season.

I am the sentimental one in our family.  I love the Christmas season, all of it: the lights, the tree, the presents, cookie baking, surprises and secrets, being with family and of course, celebrating the Reason for the Season – God becoming a man and dwelling among us in order to fulfill His plan of redemption.

On the other hand, I don’t think my husband has a sentimental bone in his body!  He is very practical, very logical, extremely well-grounded in Scripture and very matter-of-fact.  This particular Christmas, he was finishing his education at seminary and had learned that most of our traditional Christmas celebrations began as pagan rituals.  He would come home after seminary classes and explain to me what he had learned in class and the conflict would begin!  He didn’t want our family to take part in any celebration that did not glorify God.  With such a youthful intensity to do only that which glorified God, he didn’t want us to participate in some of the traditions I loved because of their original intent.

Technically I agreed, I certainly didn’t want to be a part of anything that didn’t glorify God!…..but I couldn’t imagine Christmas without all the traditions I had grown up with and loved nor could I imagine not sharing those traditions with my children. 

After much discussion and heart searching, we decided we would keep Christmas traditions as a part of our celebration (yeah! – I could still have a Christmas tree!!), and purposefully seek to make the true meaning of Christmas the focus in our family by telling the Christmas story often to our young girls and singing religious Christmas carols with them. 

It was our routine to read or tell bedtime stories each night to our girls; and, during this season, the Christmas story was a much repeated favorite.  Being a natural storyteller and intent on making sure his daughters knew the true Christmas story, Ken would tell the birth of Jesus with great enthusiasm and drama.  We weren’t sure how much their young minds comprehended, but we were genuine in our desire to glorify God with our Christmas celebrations.   Yet, Ken still was uncomfortable about having the Christmas tree and other “pagan” celebrations in our home, but God was about to give us a sign.

Come back tomorrow to find out how.
Joi (aka Amanda's mom)

This is a repost from last year.  Originally posted here.

I, Amanda, asked my mom to share one of my family's favorite Christmas stories.  So, today and tomorrow she is guest blogging here at following an unknown path.  Now, without further adieu, let my mom take you back 25 years, to the Christmas of 1981 . . .

Christmastime is supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, but there was conflict in our household.  My husband and I disagreed for most of our newly married four years on how we should celebrate Christmas and neither of us wanted to give up any ground.  However our children were getting older (3 years and 18 months), and we needed to reach an agreement on how our young family would celebrate this season.

I am the sentimental one in our family.  I love the Christmas season, all of it: the lights, the tree, the presents, cookie baking, surprises and secrets, being with family and of course, celebrating the Reason for the Season – God becoming a man and dwelling among us in order to fulfill His plan of redemption.

On the other hand, I don’t think my husband has a sentimental bone in his body!  He is very practical, very logical, extremely well-grounded in Scripture and very matter-of-fact.  This particular Christmas, he was finishing his education at seminary and had learned that most of our traditional Christmas celebrations began as pagan rituals.  He would come home after seminary classes and explain to me what he had learned in class and the conflict would begin!  He didn’t want our family to take part in any celebration that did not glorify God.  With such a youthful intensity to do only that which glorified God, he didn’t want us to participate in some of the traditions I loved because of their original intent.

Technically I agreed, I certainly didn’t want to be a part of anything that didn’t glorify God!…..but I couldn’t imagine Christmas without all the traditions I had grown up with and loved nor could I imagine not sharing those traditions with my children. 

After much discussion and heart searching, we decided we would keep Christmas traditions as a part of our celebration (yeah! – I could still have a Christmas tree!!), and purposefully seek to make the true meaning of Christmas the focus in our family by telling the Christmas story often to our young girls and singing religious Christmas carols with them. 

It was our routine to read or tell bedtime stories each night to our girls; and, during this season, the Christmas story was a much repeated favorite.  Being a natural storyteller and intent on making sure his daughters knew the true Christmas story, Ken would tell the birth of Jesus with great enthusiasm and drama.  We weren’t sure how much their young minds comprehended, but we were genuine in our desire to glorify God with our Christmas celebrations.   Yet, Ken still was uncomfortable about having the Christmas tree and other “pagan” celebrations in our home, but God was about to give us a sign.

Come back tomorrow to find out how.
Joi (aka Amanda's mom)

This is a repost from last year.  Originally posted here.

a mother's touch

       My thirteenth year of life was horrible.  I was changing from a girl into a woman, and I felt everything and everyone was against me. 

It was Christmas Eve and none of my clothes from the year before were fitting, and I could do nothing with my frizzy curls.  I cried for at least an hour after stomping up the stairs in utter frustration with my mean mother who did not understand me at all!  Then came the gentle knock on the door.  My mother had a red turtleneck and a beautiful white fuzzy sweater across her right arm; "May I come in?"  She came in and helped me dress; then we went to her room where she did my hair and even did my make-up.  She then let me borrow one of her necklaces.

Everyone was waiting downstairs for us to come down so we could open presents.  As I walked down those stairs, I felt like the most beautiful girl on the entire planet.  I felt like everyone on the whole earth was watching me descend down the stairs (not just my family).  I have never felt more beautiful in my whole life.       

The other day, I saw a picture of that Christmas Eve.  I remembered feeling so beautiful, but as I looked at the picture, I just saw a plain girl in her mother's sweater with frizzy curls. 

So what had made the difference? 

My mother's opinion of me.  Her time and attention and her care, along with a few complements, I'm sure, made me feel like a beauty queen.

Never underestimate the power of a mother's touch.

my origins (aka: where I am from)

I am from storybooks and
Cabbage Patch dolls,
from a box of 124 crayons.

I am from cinnamon rolls, banana bread,
and gravy poured over broken biscuits.

From yellow and green gingham,
the CareBears, and pink and blue bows.

I am from the new, new house
in a little bit of Forth Worth.

From the parsonage next to
the small-town church
with the two story slide.

I am from mud pies,
picnics in the front yard,
porch swings and rocking chairs.

I am from “life is not fair”
and “I told you so.”

From washing windows on Saturday
and it’s your turn to empty the dishwasher.

I am from preachers,
Sunday school teachers,
and the church pianist.

I’m from Jesus Loves the Little Children,
and Great is Thy Faithfulness.

I’m from pajama days
and a little black pick-up truck.

From chicken and dumplings,
chips and salsa, peppermint birthday cakes,
and don't forget the Diet Coke and Bluebell.

I'm from Podunk, Arkansas
and Smalltown, Texas.

From huge family get-togethers, days on the lake,
and Christmas at Grandma’s.

I am from the woman who tossed cold water on her rowdy boys,
the high school sweethearts who married,
the boy who was tricked to run down a steep hill,
the strangers who met on a bus.

I am from the boy who jumped off a bridge and broke his nose,
from the girl in the fluffy pink sweater who hated her curls.

I am from Dot and Joe, Mildred and Euel, Joi and Ken,
from love and laughter, faith and family,
hugs and kisses.

~*~*~*~*~

Giving credit where credit is due: Poems like this have been circling the web for awhile now--I first remember seeing them in the winter/spring of 2005.  They are inspired by George Ella Lyons' poem "Where I'm From." And, there is even a template to help you get started if you'd like to write your own.

Christmas Past, 1981 (part 2)

Today my guestblogger, my mom, finishes the story she started yesterday.  (Just FYI, the pics are from 1979 and 1980--it's the best I could do with what I have here with me in Taiwan.)

It was a warm Texas December night and a very special one for us (ok – very special to me, the sentimental one!).

It was our first time decorating a tree with a child old enough to participate.  We purchased a small Christmas tree from the local grocery store and carted it home on top of our Pinto station wagon.  Ken crafted a tree stand out of scrap wood and we placed the tree on top of our end table, hopefully out of the reach of our toddler’s (Sarah’s) grasp.  We placed the lights on the tree and Amanda and I began hanging ornaments.  She was so excited we were celebrating!  I was so excited – I got to keep the traditions!

It came time to turn off the overhead lights and plug in the Christmas tree lights.  As soon as the lights on the tree began shining, Amanda, overcome at the beauty of what she was seeing, spontaneously began to exclaim “Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the Highest!  Glory to God in the Highest!  Glory to God in the Highest!”  She raised her arms and began dancing around that small glowing tree praising God, repeating that phrase over and over just as the angels must have done on the first Christmas night.

I don’t think I’ve ever witnessed worship as genuine as the worship I saw that night!  Worship from one with such a pure heart and pure motives – a precious three-year-old, who knew only that we were celebrating the birth of Jesus and that our Christmas tree was shining just as the heavens were the night of His birth when angels praised God and proclaimed His glory. And, she wanted to celebrate and praise Him in the same way!

That Christmas, God gave us just what we needed through the faith and actions of a three-year-old child.  That experience changed our perspective on Christmas celebrations.  We both realized that a Christmas tradition held its meaning only in the heart of the person participating in the tradition – you could focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings felt by reliving the tradition or you could focus on the original intent of the tradition or you could focus on the One for Whom you were celebrating as you participated in the tradition.

In our family, we choose to focus not on feelings or original intent, but on the Reason we were celebrating.

Each year, as we decorate our tree, it is a family tradition to tell the story of the night we worshipped with Amanda around our first family decorated Christmas tree. We seek to have the same worshipful heart as a three-year-old who, though only looking at the lights on a small Christmas tree, saw a sky filled with a host of heavenly angels proclaiming God’s glory at the birth of His Son and joyfully joined in the angels’ praises.

Now that is giving meaning to a Christmas tradition!

~Joi

Amanda: Isn't that a great story!! I just LOVE it!!  My mom is so right . . . when we look at our Christmas traditions--or any traditions for that matter--we can foucs on one of three things: (1) warm, fuzzy feelings, (2) original intent, or (3) Christ. 

For me and my sister (I think she would agree with me), that now as adults, because our parents focused on Christ at Christmas, the "warm, fuzzy feelings" of the holiday didn't dissappear but were intensified.  It is not that our traditions became stoic--how can worship of the long-awaited Savior be emotionless?  No, the "fuzzy feelings" didn't dissappear, they just were not the reason we did the things we did. 

As adults, my sister and I anticipate Christmas traditions becuase we are excited to worship the King of kings and Lord of lords; we look forward to being able to express our love for him in unique once-a-year Christmas ways.  Through participating in Christmas traditions, we enjoy being able to proclaim "Oh! Oh! Glory to God in the highest!!" and "Jesus, we love you!!" 

Like Sarah said in a comment last week:

as a child it was so neat to me to tell Jesus happy birthday and it was the beginning of me really realizing as such a young child that I could speak to Him and sing to Him, and not just about Him.

I too though have the sweet, precious, innocent, warm-fuzzy feelings and memories attached to this song, and thought that life was GREAT and that everyone loved Christmas and Jesus just as much as we did.

Christmas Past, 1981 (part 1)

I, Amanda, asked my mom to share one of my family's favorite Christmas stories.  So, today and tomorrow she is guest blogging here at following an unknown path.  Now, without further adieu, let my mom take you back 25 years, to the Christmas of 1981 . . .

Christmastime is supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, but there was conflict in our household.  My husband and I disagreed for most of our newly married four years on how we should celebrate Christmas and neither of us wanted to give up any ground.  However our children were getting older (3 years and 18 months), and we needed to reach an agreement on how our young family would celebrate this season.

I am the sentimental one in our family.  I love the Christmas season, all of it: the lights, the tree, the presents, cookie baking, surprises and secrets, being with family and of course, celebrating the Reason for the Season – God becoming a man and dwelling among us in order to fulfill His plan of redemption.

On the other hand, I don’t think my husband has a sentimental bone in his body!  He is very practical, very logical, extremely well-grounded in Scripture and very matter-of-fact.  This particular Christmas, he was finishing his education at seminary and had learned that most of our traditional Christmas celebrations began as pagan rituals.  He would come home after seminary classes and explain to me what he had learned in class and the conflict would begin!  He didn’t want our family to take part in any celebration that did not glorify God.  With such a youthful intensity to do only that which glorified God, he didn’t want us to participate in some of the traditions I loved because of their original intent.

Technically I agreed, I certainly didn’t want to be a part of anything that didn’t glorify God!…..but I couldn’t imagine Christmas without all the traditions I had grown up with and loved nor could I imagine not sharing those traditions with my children. 

After much discussion and heart searching, we decided we would keep Christmas traditions as a part of our celebration (yeah! – I could still have a Christmas tree!!), and purposefully seek to make the true meaning of Christmas the focus in our family by telling the Christmas story often to our young girls and singing religious Christmas carols with them. 

It was our routine to read or tell bedtime stories each night to our girls; and, during this season, the Christmas story was a much repeated favorite.  Being a natural storyteller and intent on making sure his daughters knew the true Christmas story, Ken would tell the birth of Jesus with great enthusiasm and drama.  We weren’t sure how much their young minds comprehended, but we were genuine in our desire to glorify God with our Christmas celebrations.   Yet, Ken still was uncomfortable about having the Christmas tree and other “pagan” celebrations in our home, but God was about to give us a sign.

Come back tomorrow to find out how.
Joi (aka Amanda's mom)

even more about amanda

I live in KaoHsiung County in southern Taiwan. This is my fifth year to live in Taiwan, and I enjoy Taiwan very much. I live in Taiwan because God brought me here to show the Taiwanese people His Love for them.

I am in Taiwan as a tentmaker--I support my missionary work by teaching college courses. I teach public speaking, biz English conversation, and English composition (the essay) regularly.  I have also taught Songs for EFL Teaching, Movie English, Internet English, listening, and pronunciation.

I graduated with my master's degree in Foreign Language Education (2003) from the University of Texas at Austin. I received my bachelor's in communication theory from Dallas Baptist University (2000).

My mom, dad, and kid brother, Sam, live near Austin, Texas.  Both my parents are teachers, and my dad is also a bi-vocational pastor.  My sister, Sarah, and my brother-in-law, Chad, both work for the Arlington Police department.  Everyone in my family enjoys laughing--and laughing loud--something I didn't realize on my own (an "outsider" pointed it out to me).

I am single, which is something I would love to be changed. :) 

And, last but definitely not least, I am a daughter of the King. I am saved by grace--something I of course do not deserve!  I desire for all that I am and all that I do to bring glory to God.  I desire to know him and make him known--this desire is the foundation of all that I am.

Thanks for stopping by following an unknown path!  I hope you find something that "tickles your fancy!"